engagement packIf any of the cast members of Jersey Shore should ever get engaged -- and that's a big IF, I'm totally NOT endorsing any of them to take that step -- I've got the perfect plan for them. Oh yeah, it's the perfect Valentine's Day engagement party bonanza for people with too much money and no sense at all.

I give you: The $10,000 Pizza Hut engagement party package A-YAND the $55,000 engagement cupcake! Boo-yah! $65,000 worth of heartburn, bling, and regret are now at your fingertips. How can you resist?

Let's take a closer look at these romantic treasures that will surely provide memories to last until the morning after (if you're lucky and drink enough). First, the pizza engagement party. Because nothing says "Look, Ma, I've grown up and I'm gonna get married!" like the same kind of pizza party you got when you turned five. Oh, but wait -- this party actually has some growed-up touches, the likes of which no kid is gonna see until at least the high-school-prom.

Get ready for: A limo, a bouquet of flowers, a personal fireworks display, a professional photographer who is probably not your uncle, a professional videographer who is probably not your cousin, and a $10 Pizza Hut Dinner Box with one medium, one-topping pan pizza, five breadsticks with sauce, and 10 cinnamon sticks with sweet icing dip. Save your foie gras for the fancy EE-LEETS, this is where the real class is. Oh yeah, plus a ruby engagement ring.

But just one engagement ring isn't nearly enough bling for your baby. That's why after you finish burping up the cinnamon sticks you're gonna present your girl with a red velvet cupcake topped with an 8 carrot diamond ring! It'll make that ruby thing look like something you fished out of a gumball machine, but of course your girl will want to wear both! On the same finger.

And you can feel good about your splurge, because that $55,000 price tag includes a 15% discount from the jeweler and REAL cream cheese frosting from the baker. That's what I'm talkin' about! But you won't even notice how that cupcake tastes -- not with all the lightening bolts streaming out of your loved one's ring finger. Awwww, you two!

If you had the money, would you splurge on either of these?

 

Images via Pizza Hut, Cupcakes Gourmet/Facebook