New Girl Scout Cookie Is Another Crummy Flop

23

girl scout cookiesI'm about to write possibly the most controversial statement I've ever made here on The Stir. Are you ready for this? Hold onto your Bumpits. I can't even believe I dare admit this to you all, but here it goes: I hate Girl Scout cookies.

I know. It's like saying "I hate puppies" or "unicorns deserve to die." But it's true. Every year the Girl Scout cookies arrive and every year I suddenly feel completely out of sync with the rest of America. Now there's a new Girl Scout cookie on the market and I'm dumbfounded. This is your new cookie? A lemon-flavored, powdered sugar-coated biscuit? What's the appeal, everybody?!? Someone please explain because I just don't get it!

Are you all just faking your love for these cookies out of kindness to the Girl Scouts? Sometimes I wonder if this is all just a charade, like pretending Santa is real for the kids. Has everyone gotten together and agreed to MAKE BELIEVE you love Girl Scout cookies just to make them feel good? It's not like the Girl Scouts make these cookies themselves!

I think the cookies promise far more than they deliver. Thin mint cookies? Love the idea. Samoas? Brilliant notion -- you should make your own. But whenever I try real Girl Scout cookies, I can't help noticing that they're made with such cheap ingredients -- that waxy chocolate that coats the roof of your mouth with greasy, synthetic gunk, the card-boardy texture and flavor of the coconut. These cookies just don't live up to the hype.

Look, if I'm going to indulge in a high-calorie treat, it had better be f*&$%ing delicious. I'm not wasting my treat-points on third-rate crap, no matter how good the cause. I am literally surrounded by spectacularly scrumptious cookies, candies, and pastry options every day -- why would I pick something with fake lemon flavor? You can have your Savannah Smiles. I'm holding out for my husband's chocolate chip cookies.

Do you love Girl Scout cookies? Do you want to try the new flavor?

 

Image via _Yuki_K/Flickr

cookies, desserts

23 Comments

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Doomy234 Doomy234

I LOVE those lemon cookies. They're my favorite. And they actually arent new, they have been out for a looooong time. We used to get them all the time when I was a kid. Maybe they just stopped selling them for a while...

nonmember avatar Cee

Wow, did someone not take their midol today?

First, ever put a box of thin mints in the freezer? Also trefoils with tea are the best!

Secondly, you help an organization that teaches girls many empowering skills, has them volunteer, learn about raising money and business.THATS why I buy them

nonmember avatar Denise

I'm so glad someone else voiced their disdain for Girl Scout cookies -- blech!! They remind me of those cheap packages of cookies you find in drugstores, except for the fact that those usually run about $0.89 each. If I'm going to use my calories toward a cookie, it's at least gonna be a Pepperidge Farm one!

sunny... sunnytxmom

You are not alone! I'm not a fan of any of the Girl Scout cookies either.

PonyC... PonyChaser

I buy GS Cookies for one reason, and one reason only: to help the young lady who is selling them to learn and understand how the process works. I will not buy from parents. If a parent approaches me to buy (anything) from their child, I will tell them no, but to send the child to me and have her give me "the spiel". I'll ask her questions, and complete the transaction with HER. So many things are simply handed to kids.... and so many parents just do the selling work for their kids... I believe it's important for the kids to do it themselves. I agree that it's SO much better to make your own, but sometimes, there's a higher purpose.


That said, I'm ok with the chocolate-covered peanut-butter deals, but the rest of the cookies I can't stand.


 

nonmember avatar rhonda

This is lol FUNNY! I DO like the little cookies but agree that they are highly overrated especially when the Family Dollar has a truly equal version in their Gourmet line suspiciously close to thin mints and samoas for around 2.00. Now remember this I like the Girl Scout Cookies but love..... nah I would have to stay away from that adjective.

nonmember avatar Kathy

I LOVE G S cookies & always have. I love lemon cookies. Last GS cookie time I was excited to see the "new" lemon cookie. When my granddaughter brought my cookies over, I went for the new lemon cookie. It really was terrible. It tasted fake. Won't be buying it again. Disappointed in upstate NY!

nonmember avatar Diane

I am, I admit a Girl Scout leader! Just so some of you know, there is 2 cookie companies in the USA that make the cookies. Both name them different and different cookie. The ABC baker always had the Lemon cookie but are different then the new lemon cookies the other baker is selling this year. And to those who hate the cookies so much can always buy a box that can be donated to troops over seas. You still help the girls out and don't get stuck with a box of cookies. Ok enough sales pitch here lol, I personally love all the cookies myself ,way before I even thought about being a leader.

elena... elena20740

i don't love Girl Scout Cookies because they r the best ever...i was a Girl Scout growing up i use everyday the values that they taught me...I'm nice to the environment because of the Girl Scouts... i learned a lot from  camping trips, feeding the poor... i buy Girl Scout Cookies because yes they r good, but because i want these girls to have what i did growing up....

GlowW... GlowWorm889

Personally, I love GS cookies! Well, mostly just the Samoas/Caramel Delites. Love those! Unfortunately, I don't know any Girl Scouts, so I was really bummed until I found that Keebler makes a knock-off for around the same price. :)

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