What does a fast food cheeseburger look like when it's sat on the shelf for a whole year? Pretty much the same as it did on Day One. Melanie Hesketh, a California nutritionist, bought a McDonald's cheeseburger a year ago as an experiment. And then she let it sit around for a whole year, unwrapped and unrefrigerated, just to see what would happen. And ... nothing happened.
The bun got a little stale, but otherwise it's pretty much the same. No mold, no maggots, it even kind of smells the same. Melanie's take on the experiment is, "Obviously it makes me wonder why we choose to eat food like this when even bacteria won't eat it." But what I'm wondering is, if even bacteria won't eat it, does it even count as food?
Maybe we should just call fast food "food-like substances." I mean, why didn't the CHEESE MOLD?!? Have you ever seen the movie Diary of a Wimpy Kid? Remember that ancient moldy cheese slice on the playground? I thought it was kind of ridiculous the way it just stayed there and never disintegrated in the rain and snow. How unrealistic, I thought! But maybe a slice of McCheese actually could live on a playground for that long -- and it was the mold that was unrealistic in the movie!
You have to wonder about a food that has 15-32 different ingredients and isn't a casserole. I mean, what's going on in there? I knew that most fast food comes from a factory and gets shipped out to individual restaurants just for reheating, but this is crazy. If we don't call it food, what else do we call it? Plastic chew toys for humans?
And if plastic chew toys for humans come in a box with a toy surprise, isn't that kind of redundant? Have a toy with your plastic chew toy! Both are delicious and equally nourishing! While we're at it, how much of that gunk does your body even absorb? You know what? The more questions I ask about this little experiment, the more grossed out I get. Let's just leave that cheeseburger on the shelf.
By the way, we are aware of last year's experiment that proved that under the right conditions, a homemade hamburger will not mold, either. Very interesting, but note that this experiment did not include cheese.
Are you surprised to hear that the cheeseburger didn't mold after a year?
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