'Whole Foods Rap' Nails Every Annoying Aspect About That Store (VIDEO)

If you are like me, you spend an inordinate amount of time in Whole Foods. Everything about the store beckons me -- the delicious samples, the wide aisles, the selection of organics, the friendly people, the fun music. The list goes on and on. Of course, they don't call it "Whole Paycheck" for nothing. And now a rap about the "Whole Foods Parking Lot" makes it all come together.

The rap, performed by production team Fog and Smog, tells a lot of truths about the store where I stock up on vitamins, natural baby products, organic strawberries, and Greek yogurt. See below:


It's funny because it's true! With lyrics like:

This buster’s on his iPhone talkin to his friends/ Pickin up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse/ You’re the most annoying dude I’ve ever seen, brah/ Could you please move? You’re right in front of the quinoa.


Damn, I'm about to check out.
Pay my 80 bucks for 6 things and get the heck out.
The express lane is moving hella slow ...
Man, these fools don't know ... that sh*t is getting REAL ...

He gets it! He really gets it! Sadly, no matter how silly I know this store to be, I can't help but keep shopping there. There is something about their perfect packaging of a healthy, yoga-filled lifestyle that keeps me coming back for more. Even my kids love it.

Even if it costs me $80 for six things, which is all too true, unfortunately, I will continue to surrender my money at the altar of Whole Foods. I am crazy that way.

Do you also obsess over Whole Foods?

Image via YouTube

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