Don't Be the Jerk Who Brings a B-day Cake to a Restaurant

on December 2, 2010 at 4:25 PM

There seems to be some confusion of late as to whether it's appropriate to bring your own birthday cake to a restaurant. Some think it's rude and annoying; others think customers should be able to celebrate their birthdays however they want -- and if that means an outside cake, then so be it.

I think it's a perfectly acceptable practice as long as you follow these five rules of bring your own birthday cake etiquette.

1. If you want to BYOBC (bring your own birthday cake), definitely choose a restaurant that employs a world-famous pastry chef who works really hard on a world-famous dessert menu. Of course your sheet cake will be immensely tastier than any gourmet dessert she/he could prepare.

2. If you are planning on bringing a birthday cake to a restaurant, never ever call ahead to ask the staff if they will permit this. Restaurants love surprises, so you should simply show up the night of, hand your cake to the host, and demand it be served -- with candles! -- at the end of the meal.

3. If you call ahead and ask a restaurant if it's okay to bring a birthday cake and they say "no," assume it's because they're a bunch of a-holes (and not because the health code prohibits bringing in outside food).

4. If you call ahead and ask a restaurant if it's okay to bring a birthday cake and they say "yes," immediately demand they store your giant cake in their tiny refrigerator.

5. If a restaurant allows you to bring in a birthday cake but charges you a plating fee (typically $1-$5 a slice), get super pissed off about it. Throw stuff even. Who cares if the restaurant is taking the time to refrigerate, present -- with candles! -- slice, and plate your outside cake? You shouldn't have to pay extra for this customary service.

Have you ever brought a birthday cake to a restaurant?

Image via mccready/Flickr

About the author Kim Conte

has shoes that make people stop her on the street and ask "Where did you get those?" but it doesn't work for taxi cabs as she was hit by one ... and lived to tell the tale. She has more freckles than Lohan but way less attitude. And she's a fierce cook with tons of recipes to share -- and wishes she could share some with Bourdain.

Filed Under: birthdays, desserts, eating out, parties

Comments (11)

truthrowan

on Dec 2, 2010 at 4:30 PM

As a restaurant worker, I have no problem with someone bringing in their own cake. Remember though, that we don't have candles on hand, and don't get PO'd when no one has a lighter. Not everyone smokes, so why should we have a lighter? Also, we have an entire restaurant of other customers to serve, many of whom are not going to sit around as long taking up valuable real estate, and are going to tip better. So if we don't get you the cake out EXACTLY when you want, understand it's because we are there to do our job, and while taking care of you is part of it, your birthday party doesn't trump the needs of the other customers.

Report this comment

hoticedcoffee

on Dec 2, 2010 at 5:33 PM

Nope. I'm of the mind that it's tacky if the restaurant already has a dessert menu (which is basically anywhere), UNLESS you've rented a private room and have checked with the restaurant to see if it's OK.

ProudSingleMum

on Dec 2, 2010 at 6:34 PM

Eh....I've never been to a party at a restaurant and had GOOD cake. The cakes that most restaurants sell for birthdays taste awful and cost twice as much as an outside cake.

I'll just continue to have birthday parties at home....makes it easier!

micheledo

on Dec 2, 2010 at 8:50 PM

We took a cake to Pizza Hut one time. DOes that count? We kept it with us and served it ourselves. I never even thought you would ask the resteraunt to cut and serve it?!

Playitagain

on Dec 2, 2010 at 10:07 PM

Chuckie cheese for my twins party. They wanted vida from disney fairies and zuko from avatar so it only made sense. We served it on our own. Chuckie cheese also says upfront you can. I will say i chose not to go with one hall for our wedding because they wanted a 6 doller a piece fee. We had 400 people and were paying top dollar already. I looked at the halls cakes and they were horrid. We ended up someplace much nicer without the fee.

toriandgrace

on Dec 2, 2010 at 10:12 PM

I would take a cake to Chuck E Cheese if we ever forked out the absurd amount of money requires to have a party there. Otherwise, we always go out to eat and then go back to the house for cake, that way we can have ice cream cake!!

Nonmember comment from Allboys

on Dec 3, 2010 at 1:09 PM

Sorry but LMAO. I was a server for a few years and always kind of thought it was cute in a way. It can be a pain in the arse but so is life. I have never brought a birthday cake into a restaurant and probably never will either. I'd rather not have that much attention and being a family of 6 I already feel like the server has done their fair share at our table.

Facebook comment from Kristy Serrano Rispoli

on Dec 3, 2010 at 7:43 PM

I brought a cake to a restaurant for my birthday from my favorite bakery. They asked if they could cut it for me & brought plates & forks. I thought it was very nice of them. I just brought it in because I picked it up mid-dinner & didn't want to leave it in the car.

tazdvl

on Dec 28, 2010 at 12:07 AM

I have never done it but if I did I would call ahead first. I would never think of asking them to keep it while we ate or to cut it for us.

Nonmember comment from momof3

on Jan 25, 2011 at 5:12 PM

I'm taking one to IHOP tonight, but we have a private room reserved & called ahead to make sure it was okay. They don't sell cakes or I'd buy it there. We're bringing our own utensils, party plates, candles, etc.