Healthy French Fries? That's Immoral!

Chili's Texas Cheese Fries
Chili's "Killer" Texas Cheese Fries
Last week the Daily Beast analyzed 36 different French fry offerings to find out which ones are the most unhealthy. They judged the French fries based on calories, saturated fat, sodium, and carbohydrates. Chili's Texas Cheese Fries topped the list at 2,070 calories and 64 grams of saturated fat while Burger King's large fries have a mere 540 calories and 6 grams of saturated fat.

I tried really hard to be shocked. Heavens to Murgatroyd, 2,070 calories! That's how many calories you should eat in one day! And yet, another question was haunting me: Which fries taste the best?


I mean, seriously, how many of you out there really think it's a good idea to eat French fries, any French fries, every day? Are people going to read this Daily Beast report and say to themselves, "Well shucks, 500 calories for Burger King fries, that's practically salad!" French fries are the reason why the phrase "sometimes food" was invented. They're all unhealthy -- that's the point! Eating them is supposed to be an occasional indulgence.

So when I do indulge in French fries, something I do maybe five times a year, they'd better be pretty @#$%ing fantastic. And you know what? I'm tired of trying limp, undersalted, healthy-tasting sweet potato fries. We can do much better, people. So in that spirit, here are the top five fries I want to try from Daily Beast's deadly list:

1. Smokey Bones Sweet Potato Stix

2. White Castle Sack Sweet Potato (but apparently they're not on the menu now)

3. Fatburger Chili Cheese "Skinny" (what???)

4. Checkers Bacon Cheddar Fries

5. Yeah, actually, I do kind of want to try those Chili's Texas Cheese Fries


Image via C

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