Today's the big day. Facebook is officially public. I know what you're thinking: Wasn't it public before? Cute. Listen, I don't understand much of this swanky Wall Street-tastic language, but from what I gather, Facebook is letting people buy their own small piece of the company (AKA, shares) for something like $38. Except you have to be one of those people that knows people to get in on the action. Yeaaaah, I'm not one of those people.

Whatever. I'm sure if actually snagging a piece of the Facebook pie for myself was a viable option, I'd care more. You know what I do care about? Twitter. Let me tell you, people have been going BONKERS over this Facebook IPO (Initial Public Offering).

Check out the madness for yourself, here:

President Obama's always been a trailblazer in the way he uses technology to communicate with the public. So, it should come as no big surprise that his re-election campaign has stepped it up yet again in the social media sphere with a new online interactive tool called "The Life of Julia." 

The "representation of a typical middle-class woman throughout the different phases of her life" allows you to click through paper doll-looking graphics that make up "Julia's" life, from ages 3 to 67. In each phase, you see how Obama's policies would benefit her versus how Mitt Romney's proposed policies would leave her in the dust. For example, thanks to Barry, Julia has improved college access, help suing for pay discrimination, and free preventative health care services, such as contraception. 

No big surprise: Conservatives have already been having a field day with Julia on Twitter, mocking her, and arguing how much worse off she'll be thanks to Obama's policies.

It doesn't exactly come naturally to me to defend Ashton Kutcher, considering that I generally find him to be a distasteful guy. But I'm going to now. Today, Kutcher's ad for Popchips was pulled for being "racist." In the ad, Kutcher plays a variety of characters, including an Indian-accented man named Raj. Within hours, people on Twitter were calling Kutcher "racist" and saying that he was doing "brown face."

What this particular incident says to me is that it's clear that we, as a country, have officially become the constipated old man at the table who sits around kvetching about anything and everything and has absolutely ZERO sense of humor! No one wants to be around him. Everyone dislikes him. Yay.

If you had to give up the internet for a day, could you do it? How about a week? A month? A whole freakin’ year? (Please note that I’m asking this hypothetically, knowing full well that I can’t even half figure out where I am or what time of day it is without hopping on Google, so I know I couldn’t do any of the above. Maybe a day, if a really good Titanic-length movie or marathon of some favorite show was on. But then I always want to learn more about something and head straight to the web, so never mind.)

Anyway, you and I don’t have to do it. The ever-so-brave Paul Miller, a technology blogger and senior editor at tech news site The Verge, officially gave up the internet for a year starting at midnight yesterday, so we can just shudder vicariously through his re-acclimation to actually having conversations on the phone (ack!) and letting his fingers do the walking (le sigh). 

If you've been wondering whether or not Ashton Kutcher really deserves that reported pay grade increase for Two and a Half Men, raising his per-episode fee to an astounding $725,000, his multifaceted appearance in a just-released Popchips campaign provides the answer once and for all: Ashton Kutcher's comedic timing and ability to portray different characters is downright amazing.

Amazingly awful, that is. I don't know what's worse about the commercial, the fact that Kutcher actually serves as the Popchips “president of pop culture,” or that the brand thought it would be hilarious to capitalize on his cheating fame by having him spoof a dating site.

Oh wait, I think I've got it: the worst part is ASHTON FREAKING KUTCHER.

I don't mean to alarm you, but it's possible that in a little more than two months, your computer will suddenly lose Internet access, thanks to the FBI. Apparently the tinfoil-hat-wearing, underground-bunker people have been right all along: the government really DOES have the power to cut off our means of global communication.

First we'll lose web access, then the phones will stop working, and after that? The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together ... mass hysteria!

Or ... okay, probably that stuff won't happen. Look, I can't predict the future! The point is, you need to make sure your computer is malware-free by July 9, 2012 (AKA 'Internet Doomsday')—because otherwise, you may experience some serious technical difficulties.

Admit it, you're getting a little tired of Facebook. I know, I know, it's like that distant third cousin you can never completely let go of ... erm, yeah, you get what I'm saying. If you're like me, you have a love/hate relationship with the social networking site, and you just can't get away. Well what if I told you there was a much FUNNER site, and this one involved SUPER ADORABLE PUPPIES.

Got your attention, eh? Meet MatchPuppy, a new combination dating/social networking site FOR YOUR DOG. Yup, precious fluffy little Onion is gonna have a page of his own! The fun part? Your canine companion OBVIOUSLY can't use a computer, so this is, like, barktastic fun for you!

So how's it all work? And what's the point? Come fetch, my dog-loving amigas:

It was only about a week after we got engaged when I was first asked, "So, do you guys have a wedding website we can check out?" Granted, in some of our social circles, I am the resident Little Miss Blogger, but still ... I don't think this was about that. It's more that as soon as your engagement is marked with a timestamp these days, people want information -- where, when, how NOW. And the web has made that info easier than ever to send out to friends and family/guests. (Plus, I get the feeling that oldsters who don't happen to have Facebook feel really left out when all you've done is announce your engagement so far on there. They want to know, "Where's the virtual guestbook for me to sign?!")

ADD-fueled temper tantrums from loved ones aside, it seems like there are many pros to having a wedding website ...