Somewhere out there Tamra Barney's ex, Simon Barney, is saying, See what I had to put up with! after tonight's episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County. It all started when Tamra and her hottie boy toy Eddie Judge invited Vicki Gunvalson and her new man Brooks Ayers to Catalina for a little getaway to celebrate Tamra's birthday.

You knew things weren't going to end well when Tamra started tweezing Eddie's nose and ear hair against his will in the limo; it quickly became clear that their honeymoon phase was long, long behind them.

Let's face it, the ladies of the Real Housewives of each and every city are much better known for their fighting than their loving. With all of that clawing and cattiness with one another, there's not much time for romance, but a few of them have managed to bring a little of it to the table.

Just like with everything else, these ladies push the limits when it comes to matters of the heart. In honor of Valentine's Day and love in all forms, let's revisit five of the steamiest, sexiest (or at least sex-filled) scenes in recent Real Housewives history.

Tonight was the third and final installment of the reunion for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It started where we left off last week with Taylor Armstrong revealing more horrific details about the abuse she alleged endured from her deceased husband, Russell Armstrong.

While it was awful to hear how he supposedly hid surveillance equipment in her car and in their home, and how he committed various other atrocities against her and some of their friends, Brandi Glanville really said it best when Andy Cohen probed her, "It freaks me out ... because he can’t defend himself." Exactly.

We also saw a brief and annoying appearance by semi-Housewife Dana Wilkey who added exactly nothing to the show or reunion. She made an attempt to make people feel sorry for her because of her rich/poor background, but just came off as more ridiculous than ever. Moving on ... hopefully for good from her.

The first few days they were in South Africa, the ladies of The Real Housewives of Atlanta were a complete embarrassment to themselves and all Americans. NeNe Leakes and Marlo Hampton led the way for sure, but all of them and their ridiculous quarreling over who got the best rooms and who got invited to what party was just painful to watch.

From throwing up a "rain shower" of money while dancing in a club to demanding hair and makeup artists before going on safari, Marlo is adamant about making her moneyed ways known. But as another Housewife once sang, money can't buy you class, which was more than apparent when Marlo showed up for the safari in sequined disco pants. Classy they were not.

Last night on the season seven premiere of The Real Housewives of Orange County, it was like poof! and all of a sudden Heather Dubrow was a new housewife. There was no gradual introduction into the group; rather one minute she was turning up her nose at a $4.9 million piece of property, and the next she was in a limo with Tamra Barney and Peggy Tanous on the way to Vicki Gunvalson's party.

We know she's thin, rich, and "probably a bitch," according to Tamra, but what else do we know about this brave new soul willing to join one of the most catty and aggressive groups of Housewives there is? She seems much too normal and classy on the surface to subject herself to their drama, but what's she really all about? And more importantly, can she really deliver the drama? Here are five fascinating things we've learned about new Housewife, Heather Dubrow:

Tonight we were back once again where it all started -- The Real Housewives of Orange County. It's hard to believe this is the franchise's seventh season and just how many spin-offs it has inspired in its wake. But what they dished up tonight was even harder to believe. It was as if all that screaming and feuding last season never happened, or that it was so minor that it could all be fixed with friendship bracelets and mojitos.

I'm all for forgiveness, but ... really? Tamra Barney and Gretchen Rossi were mortal enemies last year. They HATED each other. But somehow, after a little lunch, they were having a secret friend-love affair with one another. I needed a little more convincing for why Tamra was so quick to apologize than her offering of: "There's a reason why dogs sniff each other's asses before becoming friends." But I can't wait to see how jealous Vicki gets when she finds out she didn't get a friendship bracelet.

It was night number two of three in The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion. While most of it felt like the lull before the final storm of drama, there were some fiery moments. Most of them involved Brandi Glanville, and she pretty much trounced anyone who dared to take her on. 

She admitted that she has regrets from the season -- like taking a Xanax and getting drunk. She said it was mortifying watching it back, but that you just have to own it and move on, which is exactly what she did repeatedly tonight.

When asked about her barely there bikini in Hawaii she defended it, "That's who I am, and I'm not going to change myself for anyone," she said. "They're lucky I had a top on."  She also set mouths a droppin' when Andy asked her what the difference between sexy and slutty is, and she said slutty involves labia. Kyle Richards looked like she was going to choke.

Since the death of her husband, Russell, Taylor Armstrong has been extremely open about the gory details of their dysfunctional relationship -- I mean, extremely open. She's taken part in many interviews where she's told tales of horrible violence and terrible abuse, including one just this morning on the Today show. And of course, there's the book she has coming out: Hiding From Reality: My Story of Love, Loss, and Finding the Courage Within.

To not feel bad for Taylor isn't human. The poor woman was verbally and physically beaten and battered -- and under no circumstances is that ever okay. But sometimes I wonder if she should stop talking about Russell and the abuse for a little while. It seems like a mental break might do her good.