Is there a shortage in fabric? Are our cotton supplies running low? You have to wonder when stars start wearing half a skirt if there's not some greater political message behind their drafty dresses. Miley Cyrus is the latest A-lister to wear a questionable outfit -- her crocheted skirt was only half finished before she decided to wear it out and about in Miami Beach. She looked crisp and cool from the waist up (that cropped chambray shirt and aviators look great on her), but from the hips down, she looked like a fifth grade art teacher who only wears clothing she knits in her spare time when she's not fixing her kiln or wondering what the hell happened to her cats.

Point is this skirt is not Miley's best look. And in Miami, you have to be careful with a pattern like that -- she'll be rocking a bizarre shin tan in no time if she's not careful.

But Miley isn't alone. 

I know it's kind of their job to look good and all, but both Miley Cyrus and Kim Kardashian have really slimmed down a bit these days. They're both looking more svelte than ever, and as it turns out, they're both crediting their slender figures to hopping on the gluten-free bandwagon, which seems to be gaining quite a bit of popularity. (Duh, I've tried it too. And yes, it does work.) But while they are both thrilled with their tight bodies, I can't help but wonder if they miss eating things like Domino's pizza, McDonald's French fries, and bowls of delicious pasta.

Giving up eating anything containing a trace of wheat, barley, or rye can be kind of a challenge, which is why these ladies (and everyone else who is salivating over the thought of eating bread) will be happy to know there is now a great excuse to chow down on Domino's -- because they've got a gluten-free pizza crust in the works. (Yes, please!!)

When you think of Miley Cyrus these days, what comes to mind? For me, I associate her with working out excessively, dating Liam Hemsworth, and you know ... just livin' it up, y'all. What's funny, though, is what doesn't come to mind ... her acting career. And guess what? She has a movie coming out this weekend, LOL. No, I'm not laughing, that's actually the name of the movie. I know what you're thinking, Miley's in a movie? Why hasn't there been any press for it? I mean, when was the last time we even saw her on the big screen, The Last Song? But in her defense, on the small screen, she did recently give a wonderful performance on Punk'd.

It just seems like other things have taken priority in her life ... like partying, for instance. I know, I know, she can't be tamed. But in my opinion, Miley needs to get her act together, and quickly.

Not the Walmart rescue puppy!Miley Cyrus is so much more than a set of flat abs and a tiny waist, y'all! Who cares what she wears to Pilates -- the girl just rescued an adorable puppy some heartless monster abandoned outside of a freakin' Walmart! In a freakin' cardboard box!!!

Seriously, this actually happened. I know it sounds kind of like an episode of Hannah Montana (except better, because hottie BF Liam Hemsworth was with her at the time), but nope -- just a day in the life of Miley. (Which, by the way, was spent at Walmart?? Guess she really is a down-to-earth gal.)

Anyway -- oh my god, wait 'til you hear what she named the little guy ...

There's a neck-n-neck race going on over at The X-Factor to fill the fourth and last judge's seat. Simon Cowell is close to signing up Britney Spears for one place. And now in the running for the last spot are Demi Lovato (rumored favorite), Miley Cyrus, Fergie, LeAnn Rimes, and Avril Lavigne. Woah. That's so much diva power in one sentence that you could light up the Grammys with it.

And yet The X-Factor doesn't need any of them. In fact, they're all a big fat waste of money. Here's why ...

It's not Miley Cyrus's fault she gets trailed by paparazzi wherever she goes, but she's still making most of America jealous with every single shot taken of her. Judging from the series of photos, it seems as though she has such a wealth of free time that all she's doing lately is enjoying the gorgeous Cali sunshine while walking her dog and coming to and from her Pilates and other exercise classes. She reportedly has so much time on her hands that she's been able to work out TWICE a day!

Some are crying "eating disorder!" at this, whilst others are clucking their tongues about how she's constantly sporting skimpy, sometimes way too glam workout attire. Both interesting queries, but all I can think about is how envious I am of her awesomely healthy fitness schedule -- and energy!

I have nothing against Miley Cyrus. I understand the girl hasn't had the easiest time growing up in the spotlight as a Disney tween sensation. (I know, I was there, in her trailer at her first concert as Hannah Montana, and she already seemed bitter and distrusting of the press.) But as far as thinking that she's got enough talent to make it BIG? Nooo way. Tabloid staple? Occasional reality show guest star (see: Punk'd)? Yes, yes. Britney/Gaga/Madonna-caliber pop icon, serious actress, or even ... judge on The X-Factor? Noooooo way.

But reportedly a source exclusively told Celebuzz that Miley's on Simon Cowell's short list of potential judges who would likely join Cowell, chairman of Epic Records L.A. Reid, and Britney Spears (whose $15 mil. deal isn't done yet, but seems inevitable). Are they kidding?! Gah!

Just before the incident, fingers intactThink Miley Cyrus is gettin' too skinny 'cause she never eats? Well here's proof that she really does eat: Miley was rushed to the hospital Monday with a cut finger -- from cooking. Check out the photos in the link. You can see the bright red blood and everything. No, that is not ketchup. 

The girl cut her finger with a kitchen knife. No doubt she was cookin' up some gluten-free grub, too. Who knew gluten-free could be so dangerous? Where there is a bloody finger, there are piles of wobbly carrots, I guarantee. Now if only Miley would follow some simple knife safety guidelines.