In terms of ridiculous entertainment industry stories, you'd be hard-pressed to come up with something less deserving of media headlines than the Justin Bieber/Orlando Bloom "fight" that went down in Ibiza a couple days ago. (I have to put big air quotes around the word fight because although technically a punch was thrown, no one actually got punched.) But we the public do love our celebrities-behaving-badly stories, so the encounter, such as it was, went viral, and now Stephen Colbert has weighed in on the "international dispute that has erupted in senseless violence."
Thanks to The Colbert Report, we can properly understand the complicated feud involving Justin Bieber, Orlando Bloom, Miranda Kerr, and Selena Gomez which led to this tragically stupid incident. Or as Colbert referred to the various couples, Morlando Blur, Mustin Keebler, and Jelusty Gobbler.