One thing is for certain: Kim Kardashian had more patience as a bride than I ever would. We're talking some serious Zen. I couldn't do it. I mean, not even if a lot of wine and some manner of prescription sedative were factored into the equation. On the season finale of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, Kim kept her cool throughout her bananas-wedding spectacular. Between Bruce Jenner refusing to lob off his ponytail, Kylie Jenner's blue hair, and Khloe Kardashian's hangover, I would have gone full-on Bridezilla three minutes into the day -- but not Kim!
Evidence as to why she should maybe be sainted: She cheerfully procured a new set of designer bridesmaid gowns the DAY BEFORE HER WEDDING when she learned her 'maids weren't feelin' the previously selected gown. If Kim had the ability to shoot lasers from her eyes, I feel that gift would have been shared on this very special episode. Thankfully (or sadly, depending on your POV), this did not occur.
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Admittedly, I am not a bride, but I have participated in my fair share of weddings. Enough of them to be fairly certain that telling a bride you aren't wearing the dress she selected with less than 24 hours to go is only something to attempt should you desire to witness the uncanny phenomenon of spontaneous human combustion. Not Kimmy. Oh no. But then again, she is no mere mortal like myself.
With a wave of her magical wand (which is made of human eyelashes), new gowns were procured for all and there was much rejoicing. I couldn't tell if Kim is really that patient or if she was just so over it all by that point that her body had shut down and she was left with no option other than to go with the flow. Thankfully, Kanye West was there to veto the Sisters K's request for visible nipple and crotch shots at their sister's wedding. He politely called it 'risque.' I, on my sofa at home, resorted to loud slut-shaming for which I am deeply apologetic. Girls, if you want your dad and other loved ones and also Valentino to become well-acquainted with your aureoles, that's on you. HAPPY WEDDING!
I wish we'd gotten to see more of the rehearsal dinner in Versailles! What do you wish you'd seen more of during the finale?
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