With the conclusion of episode 7 of season 4 of Game of Thrones, "Mockingbird," it's pretty scary to think that there are only three episodes left! After a fiery finale at Tyrion Lannister's trial at the end of episode 6, "The Laws of Gods and Men," of course we're wondering what's in store for one of our favorite characters -- but also want to know what else is going on around Westeros. "Mockingbird" should most likely refer to Petyr Baelish, as the black mockingbird is his personal crest.
Still, there are many characters we need to catch up with, from Daenerys to Jon Snow to Bran Stark to Arya Stark to Pod and Brienne on their quest to find Sansa. All this is leading up to what should be an exciting episode 9, usually the craziest and most climactic every season.
So let's get to it, shall we? As always, there are MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD for "Mockingbird." There's a lot to cover and you're going to want to watch it first!
Jaime lectures Tyrion for demanding a trial by combat. He had secured Tyrion's future as a member of the Night's Watch, though Tyrion admits it was Shae's false testimony that put him over the edge and caused him to unleash his somewhat psychotic yet badass speech. Plus, Tyrion couldn't give his father Tywin the satisfaction of having Jaime being the heir and shipping Tyrion off to the Wall.
"Don't give up on me just yet," Tyrion pleads. Jaime admits he can't save Tyrion this time because he can't fight with his false hand. Tyrion asks Jaime to find Bronn -- he won for him once, he can do it again.
Jaime tells Tyrion who Cersei picked as her champion -- yep, it's as a lot of you predicted: Gregor Clegane, aka the Mountain, who brutally murders a bunch of men in his opening scene (the dude's been recast a few times).
Bronn visits Tyrion in his cell. Tyrion immediately sees Bronn's new clothes and his face falls. Bronn admits that he is going to get married to a "dim-witted" girl, which was all arranged by Cersei. He's going to get a castle out of all of this, while Tyrion can only give him "gold and gratitude." Bronn also says that it's simply not worth the risk -- the Mountain is too dangerous. Why risk his life when he has a wife and land and gold all to himself? Tyrion pulls out the friend card and even that doesn't work. He is quickly running out of options.
Tyrion gets his third visitor, Oberyn Martell, aka the Red Viper. Oberyn is surprised by Cersei's insanely strong desire to see Tyrion dead. Then Oberyn admits that he saw Tyrion when he was just a baby. A baby that was rumored to be an inhumane monster with claws and a tail. They begged to see the baby and were disappointed by how ... baby-like he seemed. Cersei was truly upset that Tyrion killed their mother while Tyrion can hardly contain his emotion by this story.
Oberyn finally confesses he wants justice for his sister and her children -- justice for the Mountain killing his sister's children then raping and killing her.
"I will be your champion," he announces.
NICE. A champion worthy of Tyrion! What a battle that's going to be.
Gregor's brother, Sandor Clegane, aka the Hound, and Arya Stark run into a wounded, dying man on the road. The Hound puts the poor man out of his misery with a quick stab. "That's where the heart is. That's how you kill a man," the Hound says, then is immediately attacked from behind. Arya recognizes one of them as the prisoners with Jaqen H'ghar. The remaining prisoner introduces himself, then Arya swiftly stabs him in the heart, just as the Hound taught her to.
"You're learning," he quips. Suppose the Hound isn't really a bad killing tutor when you come right down to it.
The Hound tries to sew up his wound on his neck, and Arya sees for the first time how deeply his fear of fire goes. It humbles him enough to tell her the story about how the Mountain is the one who burned his face for playing with one of his toys. It wasn't even the pain that caused the most scars -- it was the fact it was his own brother and their father covered it up. Arya softens and helps the Hound close up his wound. These two are getting so close that it'll be interesting to see what could possibly break them up.
At the Wall, Ser Alliser Throne and Jon Snow argue about how to best defend the Wall against thousands of wildings. Jon wants them to seal the tunnel, but the head honchos refuse, then punish him to boot by giving him a super-crappy watch. It's easy to imagine that they will end up regretting this decision.
Daario sneaks into Dany's room like a teenager through the window and brings her a bunch of flowers he had to swim a mile for to retrieve. Still, Daario admits to feeling ... unsatisfied, both in women and in war. After pouring herself a drink, she asks him to take off his clothes. The scene ends before there's any sex -- how very unlike Game of Thrones.
Though it is like Game of Thrones to cut to Melisandre chillin' in the tub as Stannis Baratheon's wife, Selyse, watches her. Melisandre gives her a lesson in powders and potions buck-naked -- as well as a justification a lot of adulterers probably use to cheat on their spouses. Though Selyse wants to leave their daughter behind, Melisandre forewarns that they're going to need her.
Back to Meereen: Daario tells Ser Jorah that Dany is in a "good mood" and of course poor Jorah can't stand the thought of them together. She admits she is sending Daario and the Second Sons to take back Yunkai and to execute every master there. After Jorah tells her that he wouldn't be around if Ned Stark did what Dany plans to do, she relents and changes her mind.
Brienne and Pod, who could probably have a show all on their own, stop at an inn, and we see an old, familiar face: Hot Pie! He goes on a hilarious rant about gravy and pie while Brienne stares at him in utter disbelief. Brienne admits they're looking for Sansa Stark, and Hot Pie of course recognizes the name. He pretends, like Jon Snow, to know nothing. Hot Pie eventually comes around and admits that he knows Arya in surprising news -- no one has heard of her since her father's beheading. He even offers Arya some wolf-shaped baked goods. Pod knows that Catelyn Stark's sister, Lysa, is in the Eyrie, so why not try there. Whoa, could they possibly be on the right track to find Sansa? Seemed a little too easy. (I was kind of expecting someone to come out of the woods and attack them at any second.)
At the Eyrie, Sansa is building a snow castle of Winterfell -- a pretty damn good one at that. Robin Arryn comes by to check it out. A friendly exchange quickly goes to hell, Robin stomps on Winterfell, Sansa slaps Robin, then he runs off to probably go tell his mother.
Petyr makes an apperance after the scuffle. She asks him why he really killed Joffrey, and he admits that he loved Catelyn more than anything. After wooing her with bewitching words, he goes in for the kiss, and Lysa from above watches the whole thing. Oh. Shit.
Crazy Lysa summons Sansa while looking out the Moon Door. This isn't looking good. Lysa threatens to throw Sansa out the door before Petyr interrupts them. "My sweet, silly wife," he coos as Lysa sobs in his arms.
"I have only loved one woman. Only one my entire life," he tells her as she smiles with hope at him.
Then he proceeds to shove her out of the Moon Door!
What a crazy end to a plot-packed episode. That fight between the Mountain and the Red Viper will probably be the most memorable one yet, and where does Petyr's latest sneaky move leave Sansa? Will Pod and Brienne rescue her in time? When will we see the attack on the Wall? So many more loose ends to tie for these last three episodes -- can't wait!
Do you think the Mountain or the Red Viper will win the trial by combat (if you've read the books, please no spoilers!!).
Image via HBO