There's been a lot of speculation that Tori Spelling's new reality show, True Tori, is fake. If it is, then give Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott and the writers of the show Emmys. All of 'em. Give them two each. Throw in one for Liam. Because I can't think of too many shows that have delved this deep into the aches, pains, hurts, betrayals, and disappointments of love. And if it IS fake, I will be in therapy to get over it! That said, the show opens with Tori and Dean in an explosive therapy session.
Tori, who has difficulty expressing her feelings -- primarily because Dean becomes suicidal whenever she confronts him -- wants to get to the bottom of why Dean cheated. He falls back on blaming Tori, basically saying they weren't having enough sex. Tori counters that they'd had sex the whole weekend before he left for Toronto, where the encounter occurred.
"Sex was an escape, just like drugs and alcohol," Dean finally admits. "It's my worst nightmare come true, something so public and it's come out and I can't get out of it, it's so public, there's no way."
Tori rightly questions whether he means it's his worst nightmare that he cheated or that he got caught. Dean backtracks, but it's obvious he's just been busted in his own twisted thinking. (He also later tells a friend that the reason he cheated is that he thought he wouldn't get caught ... so I think we're now clear on his "motive.")
The pair then get to the crux of much of their marital breakdown -- Dean expected that sex would continue like it was during their honeymoon phase. Tori more realistically expected their sex life to evolve (i.e., slow down) given the fact that they have four children.
"I could have predicted this would happen," Tori cries. "It was never enough for you ... he's going to cheat on me ... he's never going to be happy with just me."
"Come on, we pushed it to a month once," Dean counters. Hmmm. Wrong answer, Dean!
"Dean, your expectations of what a marriage is supposed to be like sexually are like a fairy tale," the therapist, Dr. Wexler, has to point out. Does Dean get that? Doesn't really seem like it.
Tori breaks down and confesses that she still feels that he cheated because she's not good enough. "I was old; I wasn't pretty enough," she says, admitting that it took her years to finally feel good about herself, given a childhood that was filled with criticism about her looks. (Tori's line about feeling old and ugly really pushes my doubts about the show's reality to the side. What actress would willingly admit this?!)
Dean, on the other hand, is equally crippled by doubts, feeling that he only has a career because of Tori.
"You both are really insecure," the doctor points out. "You both feel you don't deserve each other." (Irony alert: They do!)
Dr. Wexler then gives them an assignment: Dean has to write an apology letter and Tori has to write a letter telling Dean how angry she is.
Later, Dean is writing his letter when his young son, Liam, begins questioning him about it. "Please tell me what it is," he begs. "Pleeease."
Dean finally explains that he did something "unforgivable" to Mommy but the letter is to ask for some degree of forgiveness.
"How do you tell your 7-year-old son Daddy is a douchebag?" Dean asks the camera.
Well, I guess you just show Liam a recording of this show in a few years. Will he want to know? How much do any of us want to know about our parents' marriage?
But would we all be a bit better off if marriage wasn't such a mysterious thing? What if our parents' tense silences and clipped exchanges and slammed doors and then maybe a sudden divorce -- all of that strange, painful mystery -- were actually explained with an excruciatingly detailed torrent of words and video? Would it be better in some way to know it all?
I don't know the answer to that. Tori and Dean's kids will someday.
Do you think that the kids should be exposed to this?
Image via Lifetime