game of thrones oathkeeper

Can we all agree that Game of Thrones season 4 has been the best one so far? Who would have thought we would have gotten so many amazing moments in the first three episodes alone. Now we are on to "Oathkeeper," and we are obviously still having to deal with the fallout of the Purple Wedding. A Storm of Swords was the best book of the series, and season 4 is highlighting it in such a brilliant manner -- this is the way TV should be made.

I can BS some more boring plot technicalities until we get to the juicy stuff, so I don't give away any spoilers. But let's get into "Oathkeeper" right away. I am obliged to tell you that there are MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD for "Oathkeeper" if you haven't caught on by now! Please watch then catch up with us. Let me just say, it's 9:02 p.m. and Game of Thrones hasn't started yet. I am not a fan of this.

We open with Missandei teaching Grey Worm some basic lessons on life. There may be a little bit of odd sexual tension between the two of them minus the fact that Grey Worm had his balls cut off to be part of the Unsullied Army (sorry).

Daenerys conveniently interrupts and Grey Worm goes on a mission underground. The slaves at Meereen are torn about how they want to live. Grey Worm emerges and champions his queen. The Unsullied provides the Meereen slaves with weapons. "If you want it, you must take it," Grey Worm tells them.

The slaves seemingly free themselves while Dany walks among them with a very smug smile on her face. They yell, "Mhysa," which means "mother," as she soaks in what she has accomplished in what appears to be a rather peaceful way. She brutally chains the masters as they chained the slave children that we saw last week -- one child at each mile-marker (163 total) as they traveled to Meereen.

We have to assume all goes well, as we cut to Jaime and Bronn discussing Tyrion's guilt: Poison isn't his style, nor is murder for that matter, says the oh so wise Bronn. Seriously, why can't Bronn rule Westeros, he's as hilarious and wise as anyone else on this damn show.

So Jaime finally visits Tyrion in prison -- remember that Jaime was in captivity pretty much all throughout season 2, and they both test each other's boundaries: Would Tyrion kill Jaime's son? Would Jaime kill his brother? They both acknowledge how interesting it is Tyrion's wife, Sansa, fled the day of Joffrey's murder -- little do they realize it was all because of the somewhat creepy desires of Petyr Baelish. Both of them could probably never figure it out -- hence the genius of Baelish's plan.

Petyr admits that he is going to marry Sansa's aunt, Lysa. You remember that she is the one who breastfed her sickly son and held Tyrion captive. Petyr interrogates Sansa about Joffrey's death -- and we finally get confirmation that it's the necklace that did him in. "A man with no motive is a man no one suspects," Baelish wisely says.

"I'd risk everything to get what I want," he also admits, and it's quite clear Petyr has a (gross) thing for Sansa. Cut from Petyr talking about trusting "new friends" who are "predictable" to a scene to Lady Olenna talking to Margaery Tyrell.

Lady Olenna discusses with Margaery her prowess in bed, which is awkward, considering it seems she wooed the man who would marry her own sister. She and Margaery are more than aware of Cersei's power on Tommen. Olenna admits to the fact that she was in on the murder as well, playing with Margaery's own necklace (hello, can we get more obvious about what happened at this point?). 

Margarey then visits poor Tommen. She is on point as ever while Tommen's trying to figure out what life's about and how to deal with a hot girl coming on to him as well as a cat (hilariously named Ser Pounce). Margaery has to know she's dealing with a much more impressionable king than Joffrey, warning him it's their "little secret." So Tommen is now dealing with the Tyrells and his insane grandfather Tywin, who knows which side he will pick and how he ends up!

Cersei is obviously freaked out about her son Tommen's fate. She can't lose another, and she asks Jaime why Catelyn Stark set him free and wondered what he promised her in return. "You made a sacred vow to the enemy," Cersei says drunkenly, glass of wine in hand. Cersei asks if Jaime would bring back Sansa's head, and he doesn't answer. She knows Jaime went to see Tyrion. "He didn't do it, Cersei," he said. She doesn't take that well and coldly dismisses her brother/lover.

Jaime and Brienne are back together again, and in this scene, he essentially chooses her and Tyrion over his sister and father. He gives Brienne his sword, made from Eddard Stark's Valyrian steel, and says, "It's yours ... You'll use it to defend Ned Stark's daughter." He wants to get Sansa somewhere safe and thinks Brienne is the one to do it. He also gives her some sick-looking armor. "I hope I got your measurements right," he quips.

You'll remember Brienne swore her allegiance to Catelyn after Renly Baratheon's murder, and now she swears her allegiance to Jaime and Sansa. Not only does Jaime give her a sword and armor, he gives her sweet, smiling Podrick. And Podrick immediately calls her "sir."

"They say the best swords have names, any ideas?" Jaime asks. "Oathkeeper," Brienne replies, hey, the name of the episode! (Yup.) "Goodbye Brienne," Jaime bids her farewell. She of course says nothing and goes off on her journey to seek out Sansa. I think it's clear from this scene that Jaime wants no harm to come to Sansa and to get her away from crazy Cersei's clutches.

But we're also reminded of the fact that Samwell is around, and no one really cares about Gilly. He and Jon finally talk about the fact that Sam ran into Bran Stark, and Jon knows what kind of danger the North is in since Mance Rayder is still such a violent threat. We also meet Locke, who seems friendly, but remember that he tried to rape Brienne and later threw her into the bear pit. He was also tasked to find and kill Bran and Rickon Stark.

Jon says he wants to go to Craster's Keep to find the mutineers and asks for volunteers. The mutineers may tell Mance what the deal is at the Night's Watch and doom them all (in terms of their pathetic, limited numbers). At Craster's Keep, it's a whole bunch of disgusting and rape-y for the poor women, Craster's wives and daughters, who are left there. A boy is born and one of the soldiers has to give the poor baby to the White Walkers. As he trumps out into the snow to leave the baby there, he seems to have a hard time doing it, then turns around without hesitation.

Bran, Summer, and co. hear the baby's cries. Bran wargs as Summer to go check it out. And we finally get a look at Ghost after so long. Suddenly, while they're scouting, they are attacked by the mutineers. (Um, yeah, from my recollection, none of this happens in A Storm of Swords.) The mutineers discover who Bran is, aka Jon's brother, and god knows where they're going with this storyline.

In the last scene, we get a White Walker carrying off the baby, who actually seems pretty damn content. The boy is put on an altar and is seemingly turned into one of them. That's a huge reveal -- we've long speculated what happened to those babies, and now it looks like we've got our answer.

What a nice reminder that the White Walkers are the ones we really should be focusing on, right? Guess it wasn't Coldhands like a lot of book fans were hoping for.

Needless to say, it was a rather tame, slow, kind of weird episode after the first three -- but let's hope that Westeros can put aside their petty differences and face the real threat from beyond the North. I hope book readers are as confounded as I am. Where do you think they're going with Bran's/the mutineers' story?

What was your favorite moment of "Oathkeeper"?

 

Image via HBO