'Real Housewives of New York' Premiere Recap: New Girl Kristen Has No Idea What She's In For!

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Kristen Taekman The Real Housewives of New York are back, and with them comes newbie Kristen Taekman. Do you think she had any idea of just how crazy this whole experience would be? One glance into Ramona Singer's pinot-pickled gaze should have told her everything she needed to know. Sadly (for her, for us it's great) Kristen forged boldly ahead anyway. You could actually pinpoint the moment she began to regret her decision.

It happened at Sonja Morgan's Mad Hatter-esque tea party. As Sonja put on her face leaving Ramona to amuse herself by examining the apartment (which was quite literally falling to pieces), roughly 80 red-haired interns scuttled past the front door where poor Kristen stood awkwardly for what seemed like decades. 

When she finally made it inside, she was treated to all the finger-food she could fit in her palm, since neither Sonja nor her murder of interns (if it works for a group of crows, I'm going to say it works for a group of interns, roll with me) remembered that plates might be a nice addition. It was a hot, sexy, New York shabby chic MESS and I loved every second of it -- even when Sonja's dog began furtively eating up all the jam.

Once they were settled, Kristen was treated to the full SoMona experience. The two buddies (now with identical haircuts) began to dish all about Aviva Drescher. While Sonja and Ramona might be able to understand each other without pausing their own monologues, it can be tricky for a beginner. Between their mania and the weird vibes thrown off by Sonja's lady-minister friend, it's frankly amazing that Kristen didn't just run for the hills before we got a chance to learn more about her foundering marriage. Whoops -- did I do that? STEVE URKEL WROTE THIS RECAP. YOU DONE GOT PLAYED.

Do you think Kristen will stay team SoMona or join Aviva's league?

 

Image via BravoTV