Juan Pablo’s Helicopter Ride With Clare Crawley Was Worse Than We Thought

clare crawleyWelcome to Hate on Juan Pablo Day, 2014. I'm thinking we may make this an annual thing, since Juan Pablo is the stand-in for every man who's ever wronged a woman -- and he can't stop, won't stop doing things that piss us off. Like what Juan Pablo told Clare in the helicopter in the finale. Remember how angry she was? Sweet Clare, who really did seem to be falling for the guy, despite all those Mr. Wrong signals he was giving off. If you weren't already thoroughly disgusted with this season's Bachelor, this one will definitely send you over the edge.

More from The Stir: Juan Pablo Finally Confesses His Love for Nikki Ferrell (VIDEO)

Okay, so just in case you weren't watching, here's some context. On the show, Clare says Juan Pablo insulted her during an off-camera moment on their helicopter ride in St. Lucia. “Juan Pablo leaned over and whispered something to me. He chose to tell me something that no woman wants to hear,” she says in her "In The Moment" interview. “I almost ... I don’t have words for it, how I feel right now.”

WHAT!!! What did he say???

According to a insider, Clare was prodding Juan Pablo, saying, "Just tell me you love me." (Oh Clare ... ) And what did Juan Pablo say? "I really loved f---ing you."

O_O

Ohhh. That's really bad.

In the history of terrible things to say to emotionally vulnerable women asking men to love them, that's almost the worst thing you could possibly say. Even saying, "I didn't like f---ing you" would be better, because at least you wouldn't feel so used. Once again, Juan Pablo has played the slut card against Clare. And it must have hurt twice as much this time.

For the record, "I really loved f---ing you" actually IS something a lot of women want to hear. Just not under these circumstances. You can say that, guys, AFTER you've told us you love us about 800 times. Or after a one-night stand when we've just told you we had fun, and good luck with your life, and if we're ever in Cincinnati again, we'll look you up, like, maybe. You can say it then.

Otherwise, when someone asks you to tell her you love her, and you don't love her, here is the appropriate response:

God, I wish I could say that, Clare. You are so amazing, so worthy of love. I owe it to you to be honest with you, because I respect you so much. You deserve someone who truly loves you. There must be something wrong with me, because I just don't feel that way. I hope you find someone truly deserving of your big heart.

Now. Was that so hard? Honestly, I hope now that some time has passed and Clare has gotten some perspective, she'll see she dodged a bullet by not winning Juan Pablo's empty, shallow heart.

More from The Stir: Juan Pablo Galavis & Nikki Ferrell Really Aren't Fooling Anyone (PHOTO)

How would you feel if someone told you what Juan Pablo told Clare?

 

Image via The Bachelor

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CLM3345 CLM3345

I agree with the other comments. While the language was crude, she opted to sleep with a man who was "dating" several other women at the same time. Some her comments made it seem like she thought she should win because she slept with him. He used a poor choice of words, but she made the poor choice to sleep with him.  I also think it was nice that he didn't propose because he's not ready.

nonmember avatar sinsear

Seriously,..WHAT did Clare expect?? Men don't have to be in love to get an erection. She availed herself and now she is whining that he wont say that he loves her. WHAAAAAAAAAA!!! She was just another "warm place to put it". Maybe when women will start learning to keep their legs closed to men that they are not in a committed relationship with, then something like this will not happen.

Wendy Parker

She should of through his sorry but out of the helicopter. He is the worst bachelor in history. any girl would be nuts to put up with his sorry but. You deserve better Claire.

nonmember avatar Bachelorette33

For some women, what Juan Pablo said is compliment. It just depends on the level of intimacy, friendship, and spiritual connection between two people. Clare was seeking "heart" love. Her strategy of sleeping with him earlier in the show backfired.

Good for Juan Pablo for NOT giving into ABC producer pressure to propose to Nikki. He broke the mold of former game contestants. He wasn't going to lie to Nikki and propose. He wasn't going to lie to Nikki and say he loved her.

Look at the history of the show: most of the "I love you, will you marry me?" couples break up after the show. Let's be realistic. It's about big advertising money and strong network ratings. Unfortunately, it's at the expense of kind souls and good hearts. And we can't help but watch or can we?

Alexis Abbott

Shame on all of you "women" for blaming Clare for his lack of sensitivity. The guys is a a homophobic, pig-headed jerk and all you ladies can talk about is how she is sleazy and worthless! You people are not perfect, nor have you always made the best decisions. He made a messed up comment. She was caught up in the emotions. Blaming her for him being an asshat is WRONG. He agreed to be intimate with her, remember??

The majority of you ladies are 50+ years old. I would suggest growing up and getting off that horse you're on - its a little too high for you.

nonmember avatar LMN

If you use sex to snag a man, you can't be surprised when he treats you like a whore. Clearly she is a bit insecure and as most opportunists do, jerky JP took full advantage of the situation.

nonmember avatar Vandana

I read some of these comments and I don't think it is fair to blame Clare. She fell for Juan Pablo and thought he had serious feelings for her. I'm not sure if you know but Juan Pablo slept with three girls on the show and one of them most likely could be Niki. Are we going to say all those three girls are sluts? That's not fair. I think Niki has low self esteem to not notice any red flags about Juan Pablo and thinks she can actually make it work with him. I don't respect Niki as much because she wants less for herself in a relationship. At least Clare was smart enough to dodge a bullet.

nonmember avatar Vandana

I think it is awful how commenters are blaming Clare and feel it is her fault that Juan Pablo was rude to her. Seriously this is why women have low self esteem and try to please men. Women go against other women and never see how it is the man's fault. Juan Pablo is an asshole plain and simple. No excuses for his rude behavior. He should have class and consideration in how he talks to people. If I was honest with my boss I would get fired. Juan Pablo seems egotistical and narcissistic to me. He only sees things from his point of view. That is selfish!

nonmember avatar Mary

I felt so bad for Clare. I hope she finds love in the future and that they do a better job of screening the next bachelor! As for the slut-shaming that he did, well, shame on him (and for many of the people on these comment boards) for promoting a sexist-double standard. It's dehumanizing and gross.

nonmember avatar Donna B.

I think Juan Pablo is a jerk; a double standard pompous jerk! Although I think Clare should have left him after his comment (like the others did when they found out what kind of person he is). But I might have done the same thing if I was her age. I think a woman should not have sex until she's married. But how many of you out there have? Be honest! Clare has a little less self esteem than Andi and the other one ( can't remember her name now) who left him. She was vulnerable and hoping for the fairy tale romance. Instead she got a double standard egotistical jerk. The show is about finding that special person to marry. By the way, I've been married 42 years and no we didn't wait till we were married to have sex.We got caught up in the moment, so don't blame Clare for this pompous jerk saying what he did. Men who belittle women don't make good husbands.

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