It wasn't that long ago that I wrote about how impressive of an entertainer Miley Cyrus can be when she does away with the twerking and tonguing and other over-the-top lasciviousness -- but you knew that wouldn't last. Miley opened her Bangerz tour in Vancouver, Canada with a show that would make Madonna blush. Well, maybe not Madonna. But pretty much anyone else.

Miley entered the stage by sliding down a large replica of her "tongue" from an enormous photo of her mouth. Her outfits were universally revealing -- some of them so high up her crotch I'm pretty sure girlfriend is gonna have some major vayjay trouble down the line.

She also simulated masturbation -- nothing Madonna didn't do 20 years ago -- and simulated oral sex on a guy in a Bill Clinton mask. Nothing Monica Lewinsky didn't do 20 years ago.

She also straddled a hot dog (oooh! symbolism!) and one of her back-up dancers was dressed up like a joint. (I don't mean those things that hold your bones together.)

There was lots of tongue, lots of foam fingers in mouth, lots of grabbing of dancers' crotches (even the girls) and lots of Miley grabbing herself. Not sure what Miley's deal is these days. Anyone know?

Well, we get it, Miley! You can have sex! And probably are. Good for you, girl. Bangerz indeed.

Any plans to see the show?

 

Image via Kevin Mazur/Getty