While we here in the States are still debating the Woody Allen molestation accusation and mourning Philip Seymour Hoffman, the French have got some real gossip to chew on. According to them, President Obama has been having an affair with -- ready for it? -- Beyonce! Yes, everything from the well-respected Le Figaro to Yahoo France to the country's version of People magazine, Gala, is reporting on the spectacularly head-scratchingly weird rumor that Obama is secretly getting it on with Jay-Z's gal. The whole thing got started when a famous French photographer told Le Figaro:
You know, at this time, the United States, there is something big that is happening ... Besides, it'll go out tomorrow in the Washington Post, we cannot say that it is the gutter press [reporting on an] alleged affair between President Barack Obama and Beyoncé. I can assure you that the world will talk about it.
Well, you know those French. Totally sex obsessed! Plus, their own president, Francois Hollande, is actually having an affair with an actress, so they're a bit more inclined to believe these things.
But following a week when a juicy rumor about Bill Clinton having had an affair with Elizabeth Hurley while still in the Oval Office -- a rumor that got skuttled when its source, actor Tom Sizemore, admitted he made it up -- we here in the States are just dying for a good old White House sex scandal! With a musical legend to boot!
Could this sex tsunami hit us as early as tomorrow? The photographer, Pascal Rostain, claims that The Washington Post will be running with the story very soon! The Washington Post puts a damper on this whole thing by totally denying it to Jezebel. But they would do that, wouldn't they? I mean, did they run around telling us who Deep Throat was? No, they didn't.
Well, I truly hope this wacky rumor isn't true. For one, Obama has a lot of enemies -- this will totally break his presidency, and he's got more important things to be concerned about. Two, I like Michelle. She would be totally heartbroken. She'll probably kick Bey's ass too. And Obama's. Three, Jay-Z! But do you get the feeling he wouldn't mind so much? Like, yeah, she cheated -- but with the President of the Freaking United States.
Anyway, we know this is all bunk. It was fun to bandy it about for a few minutes, wasn't it? (Now don't make a fool out of me, Beybama, and have this turn out to be real!)
Ooh-la-la, ils sont fous les francais!
Do you think Obama and Bey are drunk in love?
Image via Alex Wong/Getty