'RHOBH' Carlton Gebbia Is Making Witches Seem More Wicked Than Ever

Carlton Gebbia Real Housewives of Beverly Hills fans are still reeling after last night's episode. After episodes of just being quietly insane on the D.L., Carlton Gebbia exploded at Kyle Richards in a moment of catchphrasery heard 'round the world. For serious: Bravo needs to look into selling "Don't You Dare Command Me" T-shirts. I'd buy seven of them and only sell six illegally from the back of my Ford Fiesta.

But this wasn't our first hint that Carlton isn't the person she pretends to be. Throughout the season, we've watched her flip from Princess of Prudery to Queen of Raunchiness, from accepting to glib and judgmental. In Housewives parlance, Carlton is totally two-faced! Her dinner at the top of the episode with Joyce Giraud De Ohoven was more proof that Carlton is, in Joyce's words, a total hypocrite.

In one of the weirder moments of Housewives history, Joyce invited Carlton to lunch in order to make sure that the loud-and-proud Wiccan had no intention of casting spells on Joyce, her husband, or her family. It was like an episode of Saturday Night Live only with less believable wigs. The dark arts are now a viable subplot on our reality television, everyone just think about that for a second.

After ominously threatening Joyce the night before, what does Carlton have the audacity to do at lunch? Get righteously insulted that Joyce was seeking assurances for her family's safety. Are you kidding me? Carlton is so quick to injury that it's impossible to fight with her -- to disagree is to have insulted her. She's made up her mind about you independent of anything you've said or done, and there's an end to it. You're just plain SOL.

It was the same last night when, after an evening of being attacked by Carlton, Kyle Richards finally lashed back and said something that got under her skin. Kyle pointed out that Carlton's rude response to Kyle's question about her tattoo made her sound anti-Semitic. It was all the validation Carlton needed and now she's off Kyle altogether.

It's one thing if Carlton was just like "you seem fake and ditsy to me Kyle, and I'm not down with it." But instead she went off at her for "labeling" things. In other words, she was livid with Kyle for having opinions and expressing them. For a person so free and open, this and everything else that comes out of her mouth seems like another example of her mammoth hypocrisy.

Do you think Carlton's a hypocrite?

 

Image via BravoTV

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