Justin Bieber is in trouble. The whole world knows it. The whole world knows it because Justin's latest run-in with the law has received more press than the Afghanistan war, global warming, and the American government routinely spying on its citizens combined. Good thing we have Justin to distract us from such depressing issues! That said, let's get to the real news: Justin Bieber is SO bad off that his old mentor, Usher, as well as his longtime manager, Scooter Braun, reportedly flew to Panama to meet up with their meal ticket friend and talk some sense into him. Yes, people, I'm talkin' intervention.
TMZ reports that Usher flew to meet up with Biebs in an effort to have a "come to Jesus" moment with him -- whatever that means. Justin has been a Jesus fan since he was born -- didn't stop him from getting into this mess.
Justin's manager, Scooter, as well as his childhood friend, Ryan, also flew down for the sit-down. I can sort of picture how this is gonna go:
Usher: Biebs, you gotta slow down. Pour the sizzurp down the drain. Get a handle on things.
Justin: I got a handle on your bank account, bro! Can't hear you over ma cash!
Scooter: Justin, get back with Selena. Get rid of this Chantel trash. The fans are going to abandon you. We need the old Justin back.
Justin: I'm too shibby for this, aight? Swag!
But, jokes aside, this is probably a good idea. Justin really needs a firm guiding hand right now -- and not the co-dependent hand of his co-partying pal, father Jeremy. If anyone can get through to Bieber, maybe it's Usher, who launched his career.
But chances are, Justin will only clean up when HE feels like it -- when he hits his own personal rock bottom. As long as he's got millions of "Beliebers" cheering his every move, no matter how asinine, he's just not going to get the message.
Hey, Usher and Scooter, here's a suggestion: Show Justin this mugshot of David Cassidy. Justin, David once had everything you have. He was the biggest teen idol in the world. This stuff goes away eventually, and all you are left with is yourself. Is this who you want to be?
What do you think will finally help Justin?
Image via Miami Dade County Jail