"Yo, it's about that time / To bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme / I'm a get mine so get yours / I wanna see sweat comin' out your pores / On the house tip is how I'm swingin' this / Strictly hip hop boy, I ain't singin' this / Bringing this to the entire nation / Black, white, red, brown / Feel the vibration." Oh my god, how could you not have felt the vibration whenever this song by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch blasted on the radio back in the summer of '91? And who would have ever thought that Marky would turn into such a rather venerable, hilarious, seemingly awesome actor as Mark Wahlberg?
Speaking about his past, Mark showed up on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno on Tuesday night, and what he said will amuse you for a solid five minutes. That's saying something, right? Joking around with Jay, he went on about everything from pulling down his pants two decades ago to the recent antics of yet another upcoming rebel, Justin Bieber.
To hype up his movie new Lone Survivor, Jay couldn't resist showing old videos of Marky Mark in all his former glory, back when he appeared on Jay's show 21 years ago. Listening to him try to talk like he was a complete and utter badass was hilarious. An old clip about how he pulled his pants down while rapping had him elucidating, "I started wearin' the longer shorts because ... the regular brief underwear ... when you run around a lot, they get sweaty and tend to get stretched out. You don't want nothin' fallin' out the side."
"Is that a big problem, falling out the side?" asked Jay in the present day.
"Not anymore," mourns Wahlberg. Then he mused, "They give Justin Bieber a hard time ... I was an absolute train wreck. Wow."
He also said that he has "a lot of explaining to do" in terms of justifying his stunts from his younger days. Don't we all, Marky Mark, don't we all ...
In other enlightning news, Mark also confirmed that he wanted his company to produce the Fifty Shades of Grey movie. He said there was a bidding war once they realized how much damn money this erotic movie could potentially make, and the other company blew them out of the water. "I wasn't gonna star in it ... but I would've like to produce it."
Cue collective awww. Even though he's 42 and just 5'8", come on, he's still a decent-looking guy!
Regardless, it would have "been fun to hang around the set and watch," quipped Leno. Mark didn't think his wife or other family would have necessarily approved of that ... so perhaps getting out-bid to produce this movie is the best for everyone involved.
Here's more of his delightfully awkward interview:
Pretty incredible that Mark went from punk Marky Mark to becoming a heroic Navy SEAL in a blockbuster film. Though he ran into a lot of trouble back when he was young (like attacking and beating up Asian people), it seems he's straightened up and is enjoying quite a lot of success as an actor in Hollywood.
Looks like Justin Bieber, who seems to be this generation's biggest train wreck (let's face it -- among many), could learn a lesson or two from Mark Wahlberg. Perhaps one day we will be looking back at Bieber's insane stunts with laughter too ... even though it certainly may take longer than 20 years.
Do you have a favorite Mark Wahlberg movie? Should Justin Bieber be paying attention?
Image via NBC