I'm a little depressed about some news I just learned. Teen Mom star Farrah Abraham was the most Googled reality TV star this year. You know who is probably more depressed about this news than I? Kim Kardashian. She is probably even as we speak dramatically falling to her knees and screaming. But don't worry Kim -- I think there's a logical explanation.
Do the words 'sex tape' refresh anyone's memory? Yeah. I don't think Farrah's "fans" were desperate to learn about her various appearances and all the gossip tidbits. I think her "fans" were trying to find a means of watching her get her freak on with porn star James Deen. This is a natural result of being in a sex tape -- people Google you. Which is sadly not innuendo.
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It's all well and good that Farrah has earned this little award. Unless she starts turning out sexy-adult-private-time tapes on the regs, I can't see her making this list again any time soon. After all, the Internet is chock-full of so many other things more worthy of being researched. Don't believe me? Here are 5 things more interesting to search for on the Internet than Farrah Abraham.
1.) Cats Falling Down
I REST MY CASE!
2.) The History of the Lime
Did you know that British sailors used to eat limes to help prevent scurvy? They didn't help as much as lemons did -- but they were cheaper. They also earned British sailors the nickname "limeys."
Boot cut? Acid wash? High rise? Distressed? There are a lot of jeans out there, you guys, and a lot of sites that sell them and children that sing about them.
4.) Typhoid Mary
Did you know that Mary was a healthy carrier of Typhoid all her life? And that she was quarantined on an island off of Manhattan for years? I kind of feel badly for her! Except for the whole refusing to admit she was passing around Typhoid thing.
5.) The Muppets
The Muppets are the greatest. Your argument is invalid.
What things do you spend most of your time reading online?
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Going to baseball games
Riding bike rides in the nice weather
Playing outside after work/school
Going for walks outside