Raise your hand if you can recite pretty much every plot point in V.C. Andrews' 1979 Flowers in the Attic based on the fact that the story is permanently seared into your brain-folds from when you read it as an adolescent. Oh yeah, me too. Did you go on to read Petals on the Wind, If There Be Thorns, Seeds of Yesterday, and Garden of Shadows? ME TOO.
So get this: Lifetime has adapted the cult classic for a movie that's set to air on January 18, and unlike the critically panned 1987 film version, this one looks LEGIT. As in, even the trailer legitimately features all the wildly creepy stuff from the original book, including -- you know this was the first thing you thought of -- the incest.
The casting looks great, with Heather Graham playing the mother and Ellen Burstyn as the evil grandmother. Plus, guess who's starring as Cathy Dollanganger? SALLY FRICKIN' DRAPER, that's who.
Not that her name is Sally Draper -- the young actress who seems to have a knack for playing television's most traumatized teenager is Kiernan Shipka. But it's sort of hard to separate the two, because it's just so horribly perfect to imagine her Mad Men character in this story.
As you no doubt remember with perfect clarity, Flowers in the Attic involves four children being locked in an attic for over two years as their mother tries to worm her way back into her wealthy father's good graces so she'll inherit some cash when he dies. As the kids languish, they endure abuse from their nightmarish grandmother, and eventually the two older siblings develop sexual feelings for each other. Various other horrors ensue, including an ongoing series of unspeakable betrayals from their mother.
Oh man, this book. Remember when Cathy kisses her stepfather when he's asleep and Chris gets mad and they have frustration-fueled sex? Remember when Chris is forced to feed the twins his own blood in order to keep them alive? It's downright adorable how worked up people got over whether Twilight's suppressed vampire boners are suitable reading material for young people, considering the YA hit of my day. Why, we had inappropriate content both ways, in the snow, uphill!
The 1987 movie pretty much skipped over the unpleasant business of brother-on-sister action, but the Lifetime version promises to deliver. As the director puts it,
The script is faithful to the book.
More specifically and kind of hilariously, Mason Dye, who plays Chris, says,
Will there be incest? Yes.
Can't be more clear than that, but in case you had any lingering fears that this movie won't cover the same icky territory as the book, the trailer should put them to rest:
What do you think? Will you watch this when it airs in January?
Image via Lifetime/YouTube