There's working, and then there's werking. Few of us get to do both, and that's why I'll defend Kim Kardashian with my last dying breath. Because even though she heralds the "end of civilization" as we know it (whatever, that has long been a fiction perpetuated by America's most boring, unimaginative cranks and we all know it), she gets to put on pretty clothes and somehow earn money just by existing and doing something else magical we can't even see. Did you see this photo she just posted? It's just an Instagram of Kim Kardashian captioned "Work day." And there she is, in a midriff-baring ensemble with just enough spiderwebby detail to both intrigue and repel us. Obviously we must discuss.
Okay, first of all, this is a work day? Here's my work day: Get up at 6 a.m., go to spin class, come back, make breakfast and lunches, get kid to bus stop, take subway to city, write seven blogs posts, come home, make dinner, feed kid, finish up whatever I didn't finish at work, collapse into bed. Here's Kim's "work day" -- put on outfit, have makeup done, have someone take pictures of me. The end. Nice work if you can get it, etc., etc. Also: ENVY, big time.
Now is the part of the blog post where we remark up on how she's wearing a midriff-baring ensemble just after birthing a baybay, but really the baby weight-loss narrative has gotten so boring and repetitive, I can't hardly stand it. So let's skip that part.
Instead, let's talk about the weird spiderwebby textile she's got on. Who designed that thing? Are we supposed to like it? It looks constricting. I'm breathing extra on her behalf just looking at it. (Waistband is a little scrunched, dear. Just saying.) Then again, spiderwebs over your body = creepy/sexy. I think this should have come out before Halloween, actually, but still the right amount of edgy.
And so there you have it. Your Kim Kardashian moment of the day. As you were. Carry on.
How do you explain why people claim they don't care about the Kardashians and yet cannot help clicking on these blog posts?
Image via Kim Kardashian/Instagram