taylor lautnerThere's a few more key roles in the Fifty Shades of Grey movie yet to be cast -- in particular, a certain close friend of Anastasia's. It's not like the producers have been taking ANY of our suggestions seriously so far, but we just can't help ourselves. Now fans are clamoring for Taylor Lautner to be cast as Jose Rodriguez, Anastasia's hot, nice-guy BFF. Because: "He’s all shoulders and muscles, tanned skin, dark hair, and burning dark eyes." Obviously E. L. James was picturing Taylor when she wrote that description. 

You know what to do, movie producers. Do the right thing. Don't be jerks.

But wait, I just had this thought: Maybe Taylor Lautner is too hot to play Jose! I mean, Jamie Dornan is smouldering and all that, but can he really stand up to Taylor's abs and pecs? (Because of course he'll be shirtless in every scene; otherwise, why bother casting him.) I don't know ... The more I think about it, the more I think casting Taylor might backfire. Are we really supposed to believe Ana will go for Christian after she sees THAT chest? That's so unrealistic. I'm not sure it's reasonable to ask audiences to suspend their disbelief to that extent.

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I know it's been forever since we've seen Taylor in anything. We want to see him. We NEED to see him. But it needs to be the right role. You know, like the true story of a man and his ridiculous pecs as they struggle to come to terms with their hotness or something like that. Look, I'm not a movie screenwriter. I'm just saying. What am I saying? I can't remember. Something about Taylor Lautner ...

Oh yes, now I remember. Taylor as Jose: Sounds perfect at first, but ultimately a bad idea because Taylor might make us forget all about Jamie.

Do you think Taylor should be cast as Jose in Fifty Shades of Grey?

 

Image via Axel Koester/Corbis