This Teen Mom revelation doesn't surprise me at all. "God I have strange dreams," Jenelle Evans mused via Twitter the other day. She didn't elaborate after that, and now we're all dying to know what she was dreaming before she wrote that. Inside the sleeping mind of Jenelle! Can you imagine? Strange indeed. I can just picture her waking up next to Nathan, kicking him awake, and telling him all about her bizarre visions.
Jenelle: Nathan, hey! Nathan! Wake up!
Nathan: Hey babe, what's up? What time is it? Oh man, it's 3 a.m. Is something the matter?!?
Jenelle: Yeah! I just had the strangest dream.
Nathan: Oh, okay babe. (Goes back to sleep.)
Jenelle: Nathan! Wake the hell up! I'm telling it to you now.
Nathan: (Whimpers softly into his pillow.) Ugh, okay, let's hear it. You're walking through the desert with a polar bear and ...
Jenelle: YES! How did you know?!?
Nathan: (Really awake now.) That's what you were actually dreaming?
Jenelle: Yeah, now stay awake and listen. Okay, so I'm walking through the desert with a polar bear, and then I get cold. So I kill the polar bear with my own hands. I don't know why it's so cold in the desert. Anyway, I eat the polar bear and wear his skin. And it dyes my hair darker brown, you know, like the color it is now? And then suddenly I have all these polar bear tattoos. And so -- ARE YOU STILL AWAKE?
Nathan: (Pause ... snort.) Totally babe. Totally awake.
Jenelle: Okay, so I have all these polar bear tattoos, and suddenly Jace is there, and he's got a permanent marker and is doing connect-the-polar bears all over me! Only instead of getting mad, it was like this fun game and we were laughing. Then you came along and we fucked like deranged monkeys.
Nathan: Okay, now your dream is getting interesting.
Jenelle: That actually wasn't part of my dream. I was just seeing if you were still paying attention.
Nathan: Babe, I told you I was!
Jenelle: Whatever. I can't remember anything after that. So weird, right? I mean, does anyone else have such crazy dreams?
Nathan: Yeah, everyone does. And they're all fascinating. Thank you for telling me yours. I'm going back to sleep now.
Jenelle: For rude! (Kicks him again.)
DISCLAIMER: I made this all up. This was not actually Jenelle's dream. That remains a mystery.
What's the strangest dream you've had lately?
Image via Jenelle Evans/Twitter