Let me guess: You weren't at all surprised to hear "Robyn's Secret" on last night's episode of Sister Wives, were you? Because of course not. What else could the weepy 4th wife's "secret" have been? Okay, maybe you didn't watch the show yet. Maybe you don't want to hear any actual, super top-secret details? Okay, I'll start out by telling you what Robyn's secret was NOT: Robyn does NOT have a secret history as a bank robber. Robyn does NOT have a sordid past as a stripper. Robyn does NOT have a history of substance abuse. Here's what Robyn DOES have ...
Unpleasant memories of losing her "purity" to a dude who turned out to be an asshole. Ummmm ... yeah, and?? Don't MOST people have those memories?? Granted, in Robyn's case she apparently got pregnant right away and married the guy even though she didn't love him to cover up the fact that she -- gasp! -- had sex before marriage. Which sucks, and I'm sorry for anyone trapped in a loveless marriage for years, but it's the next part of Robyn's "confession" that really bugs me out: She says she felt "guilty" when she got together with Kody because he wasn't her first. OH COME ON!! Stop feeding this "ruined woman" bullsh*t to your impressionable teenage daughters and start teaching them that one regrettable hook-up does not a tragedy make. Ooooh, the whole thing just makes my blood boil.
In other news, Robyn has a big-ass new house, which you can see in this clip in all its big-ass new house glory.
Do you think Robyn's tearful "confession" was over the top and sent the wrong message to kids?
Image via TLC