ian somerhalderLooks like Ian Somerhalder's got himself a new bitch. The Vampire Diaries actor, and Fifty Shades hopeful, posted a photo to Instagram, showing off the new love of his life: A dog he's named Nietzsche. The pup apparently is a stray that was found wandering around in traffic near The Vampire Diaries set. Ian captioned the photo of himself and his dog: "My new girl. Rescued from traffic near The Vampire Diaries stages just a few hours ago -- so smart, so beautiful & charming -- all a man could ask for in a girl. So happy together. Her name is Nietzsche."

And then millions of girls melted into puddles of goo, their liquid selves slipping down into sewers and shower drains. And now there's a weird Ian Somerhalder fan club underground.

Sometimes, it actually seems like Ian Somerhalder is a caricature of himself. Or a character in a Saturday Night Live sketch: Sensitive Guy. Not only did Ian just adopt a stray pup (who he named Nietzsche), dude plans on opening a center for abused animals. He actually at one point said: "We're building an animal sanctuary that's also going to double as a sustainable agriculture farm and triple as a youth education camp. When a young person comes to that farm, they leave with a different understanding of compassion." I mean, come on. Is this man for real? He's like Feminist Ryan Gosling incarnate!

Whatever Ian's doing (being hot), he needs to keep it up (continue being hot). Not only is he melting hearts with his whole Sensitive Guy persona, he truly has convinced the world he's the only man who can play Christian Grey. At this point, if the role winds up going to someone else, I wouldn't be surprised if there were riots.

Riots that Ian would peacefully protest. Swoon.

Who do you think should play Christian Grey?

 

Image via Ian Somerhalder/Twitter