Whoa. WHOA, whoa. Um, you know how tonight's episode of Sister Wives was called "A Christmas Surprise"? And we were all (or I was all) speculating about what Robyn's "surprise" gift to Kody was gonna be, and yada yada?? Well, Robyn's gift was a surprise and stuff, but trust me, there was a WAY WAY bigger surprise in store for the rest of us. And it had nothing to do with Mariah being a Miss Moody Pants (again) or Kody being an oblivious goofball (again) or everybody going "blah blah blah Christmas blah blah blah houses blah blah blah" (again).
What it DID have to do with was the incredibly bizarro twisted family ties reveal that came, inexplicably, during an otherwise inane conversation about caramels.
So, apparently Kody's mom makes these crazy good caramels every Christmas, right? Except this year she's not gonna do it -- instead, she sent Kody the recipe and now all four wives are supposed to try making the caramels as part of some sort of "which wife can cook the most like my mama" contest. So Janelle's all like, "Well, I have a secret weapon" and it turns out the secret weapon is her mom, who is MARRIED TO KODY'S DAD, which makes Janelle's mom Kody's mom's sister wife.
DID YOUR HEAD JUST EXPLODE?! Cause mine did. It did. All over the flippin' place. Yeah. Like, according to Janelle, even before she and Kody started "courting," her mom got married to Kody's dad. (It seems that Janelle's mom only started hanging out with Kody's dad in the first place to make sure that Janelle wasn't getting involved in some weirdo cult. Which only makes the whole thing that much weirder. But anyway.)
The actual "Christmas surprise"? Robyn had her last name legally changed to "Brown." Awww, everybody cry! Also, Christine won the caramel contest, even though Meri and Robyn totally CHEATED and used storebought caramels for their contest entries. And then ... Meri got her house. FINALLY. God bless us every one!
Did you know that Janelle's mom was Kody's mom's sister wife?
Image via TLC