Lea Michele ‘Can't Cope’ With Cory Monteith's Death -- Of Course She Can’t!

Lea Michele Cory MonteithAll eyes have, understandably, been on Lea Michele since her boyfriend and co-star Cory Monteith died of an overdose. Reports say Lea "can't cope" -- that she's inconsolable, racked with guilt, and angry; still other reports say Lea can't even get out of bed. And you know what? That's all absolutely, totally understandable and normal.

One "insider" said this of the devastated Lea Michele: "She's furious one minute and wracked with guilt the next. I think she's wondering how she'll ever get over his death -- and if that's even possible." As someone seven months ahead of Lea in the grieving process, I think I know the answer to that question ...

It is and is not possible: Lea will, and will never, get over Cory's death. Both of those things can be true, even though they directly contradict each other. She will continue on with her life, eventually, but it will never be the same -- and, speaking from experience, when you love and lose someone like that, you wouldn't want it any other way.

Lea also reportedly hasn't been in touch with any of her Glee co-stars, which also makes perfect sense to me.

The thing about grief is that not only does everyone experience it differently, but the same person can experience it differently from day to day -- or even from moment to moment. When my sister died last winter, I couldn't believe the round-robin of emotions I found myself on. One moment I was sobbing, then a little while later, I'd be laughing hysterically over some morbid joke, and then a little while later, I'd be flat in bed, feeling physically unable to move beneath the oppressive weight of my sorrow.

I appreciated SO MUCH that friends and loved ones far and wide reached out to me and my devastated mom, but I wasn't able to call them back right away -- sometimes it took too much energy to even listen to a voicemail. But then other days we wanted company; we needed people around us to talk and laugh and share memories. I imagine the same will be for Lea, once she gets through these first few weeks that must seem to her impossible to get through.

And soon, Lea will be doing another thing that probably seems impossible to her right now: She'll be back to work on the set of Glee when it starts production again. Sadly, I know too well how hard this will be not just for Lea, but for everyone else who worked with and loved Cory. But it will also be good and healing for them, to carry on with the work they love, with the show that will always have Cory at its heart.

Do you think Lea Michele seems to be reacting normally to her loss?

 

Image via GleeonFox/YouTube

celeb couples, celebrity death, glee, grief, television

11 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

Chana... Chanandler.Bong

It would probably be easier for her to cope if her friends wouldn't sell stories to magazines about how she isn't coping well. Many of us were upset about Cory's death, and concerned for Lea. Perhaps, though, it's time to leave her alone and allow her to heal.

SaphireH SaphireH

Im still so heartbroken for her

bills... billsfan1104

What happened with your sister?? You speak of her so eloquently, and when you speak of your pain, I can almost feel what you have been through. I hope you and Lea eventually heal a little bit of your heart.

nonmember avatar Lea le maistre

I agree with everything you said it is never the same this is also going through the experience of lost the guy who wasn't just my best friend but also the love of my life got taken away within minutes and eventually died in my arms without any warning also through taking heroin and alcohol, it will take time but the pain never goes by life does go on but through my honest opinion the pain never truly goes away I wish it did but nothing's ever the same; everything we used to do together is now me just having memories doing it alone every joke we shared now makes me cry but at the same time reminds me if what I felt when he was there and sometimes I still turn around if someone sounds like him, he is always here and yea it takes time but you never forget and I still to this day can't let go fully xx

nonmember avatar Zuri

I'm eight years ahead of her in the grieving process. Eight long, turbulent, bipolar-like years. And while Lea Michele isn't five years old, I think my experiences are at least somewhat similar. When Grandma fist died, my immediate response was sadness- what was going on, I loved her, she'd lived with us for a year, I saw her so much, how could she just be gone? I did feel a small degree of anger, since there was medical incompetence involved in her death, but that died quickly. I tried to distance myself from what had happened, and I did become detached, but I was a little girl- I could bury myself in my toys and games. For subsequent losses, I found it harder to ignore what was going on as I got older and more aware. After a while, I was able to confront the loss, move on, and be a normal, happy kid again. I've gradually learned to lead a normal life as I became preoccupied with other things. I hope Lea Michele will be able to move on too. RIP Cory :-'(

nonmember avatar Cheryl

My mom's husband was killed three years ago (actually, Cory died on the three year anniversary of his death) and it seemed like the world, especially for her, had ended. It took her weeks before she could go back to work and she never was able to return to the places they had eaten or shopped. And she didn't have all of the world's eyes on her, either. Even now, she still cries and has his pictures everywhere. But her life slowly found a new normal and she went back to work and started living again. Lea is exactly where I expect her to be in the grieving process. And actually, I'm glad she isn't out and about, seeing the headlines and mag covers. One mag said Cory's death could have been prevented, then there was a smaller line under that indicting Lea could have saved him. How awful it would be for hr to see that with the guilt she is already feeling. I'd actually be surprised if Lea made an appearance in the first two eps of Glee. I'm guessing they will be Lima centered. And perhaps a brief appearance in the tribute episode only. She'll need more time to grieve and that should be respected.

nonmember avatar Kirsten

It has been 15 months since my little ( 28 year old ) brother died of a herion overdosed I definitely do not believe Lea Michelle is over reacting... Best of wishes Lea its a process he will always be in your heart and also to April Daniels Hussar hugs I found that always remembering the fun we had growing up always puts a smile on my face.
Kirsten

TucsonKC TucsonKC

She deserves to be pissed off in her grief.  Cory left this world owing so much.  He owes Lea a partner, Glee his talent, his parents a son, and his fans his performances we waited for every time we saw him in ANYTHING.  You bet she is grieving the only way any of us would.

Pete Lloyd

I think we have no idea really how Lea is coping or not because these gossip rags are full of  crap.  I have no idea why people source them as if they are Gospel.

nonmember avatar Anna

July 13, 2001 was the date that my boyfriend was found dead, and the day that I received the phone call. I am 12 years ahead of Lea in the grieving process and some days it feels like it was yesterday. Having read these articles, and getting the news on Twitter the minute the story broke, brought back feelings and memories that I thought had long passed as time went by. She is grieving as any of us have or would. She will go on with her life but it will never be the same, as mine hasnt been the same. I saw a magazine that supposedly took you inside her final viewing of Cory and I was pissed as hell! That stuff is not for us to see. I know I was pissed at my boyfriends funeral because there was photographer there for some family tree book that had been in the process or some crap. I think it was morbid and disgusting and the only people that needed to see Corys memorial were the people that were there. So much for respecting their privacy. Im not attacking you for writing the story. Your entitled to your opinion and to get ours. Im pissed at the ones who cant mind their own business and spread lies around.

1-10 of 11 comments 12 Last