Attention America, attention: I have a very important announcement to make. The feds are not raising the interest rates at this time. No wait, that's not what I was going to tell you. Oh yes, here it is: Bachelorette Emily Maynard's former fiance Jef Holm says he's still single and is just dating a lot of girls for fun.
I know, right?!? Now's the best time to take out a home loan. I mean -- we're shocked, shocked! to hear that Jef is still single and just playing the field. One minute he's engaged to Bachelorette Emily Maynard, supposedly ready to settle down. Then boom, they break up and he's back to being some 20-something player. You don't suppose ... HE WAS JUST A PLAYER ALL ALONG? This is me clapping my hands to the sides of my face in wonder. What -- you mean people who aren't serious about settling down go on The Bachelorette anyway? And compete to become engaged to someone they have no intention of marrying?
But wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. Here's what Jef told E! "Right now I consider myself single. I'm focusing on me." Jef's been linked with a number of ladies since his publicity-winning breakup with Emily. Most recently he's been seeing a 20-year-old student named Michelle Mugleston. (She's the baby-faced one sitting right next to him in the photo. Jef turns 29 in July.) But they are NOT serious. "I'm having fun right now," Jef emphasizes. Well duh, she's still practically a child.
Look, I'm not surprised Jef is single and just dating for fun right now. And I wouldn't be surprised if he went on The Bachelorette without sincerely wanting to find someone to marry -- I don't think half those people are actually looking for a mate, or they'd be in the real world dating normal people. So ... why bother with this show?
What if they called it "Who Wants to Hook Up With This Lady?" and still made it a competition. She'd still pick her favorite man, but instead of everyone pretending this is all about marriage (snort), they'd just disappear into the Fantasy Suite and cut to commercial. A different guy would win every week! I would totally watch that show.
But no. America wants some morally-upright fairy tale where people pretend they want to get married and live happily ever after -- a show where people get to be born-again virgins. I guess the transparent hypocrisy is part of the fun.
Do you think Jef Holm was ever serious about getting married?
Image via Instagram