She may be a grandmother in her 50s, but tonight on The Real Housewives of Orange County, Vicki Gunvalson proved she's still a broken teenager at heart. During a dinner date with her on-again off-again boyfriend Brooks Ayers, Vicki tells him she needs a boy in her life to take care of her. She then proclaims she is embarrassed that she's crying, which came as news to the viewer, who can't tell when she's happy, sad, or indifferent thanks to the incredible amount of plastic surgery she's had in the last few months.
The date with Brooks was just pathetic. It's unclear why Vicki can't see why this con artist is bad news for her, but she told him she's still in love with him, twice, while he tried to villainize her daughter Brianna and admitted to seeing other women. How's that love tank, huh, Vick? Full of his B.S. yet?
When we weren't cringing for Vicki, we were relaxing with Lydia McLaughlin's mom, Tinkerbell. That woman was hilarious. Seeing Lydia and her together made me like Lydia more, and it also made me wonder why Tink drove home after that shopping excursion. I'm sure Lydia's used to being the designated driver when her mom's loaded and/or pretending to be a tree ... shouldn't she have taken the wheel?
Meanwhile, Alexis Bellino lamented being called a phony while pretending to take off makeup before bed, and Gretchen Rossi displayed her amazing ability to not move a facial muscle while crying over Slade's son's tenuous health. Tamra Barney opened some Wives for Wine business that absolutely no one cares about because, newsflash, Tamra: been there, done that. Everyone on Bravo has their own brand of alcohol, and I gotta tell you, it's boring as shit.
Heather Dubrow, however, brought some interesting things to the table this episode. We (and their three eldest children) got to see a shockingly real exchange over dinner between her and Terry. It seemed to be an organic conversation and a natural disagreement, something we're rarely privy to on reality TV these days. Heather was pissed that Terry doesn't acknowledge how hard she works raising their four kids; Terry was pissed that Heather can't take a joke, and yada yada yada everyone's uncomfortable and inwardly begging the waitress to set the pizzeria on fire just so the tension will be broken.
Next week, the girls head to a wine tasting and the previews seemed pretty banal. I mean, once you've seen a marriage disintegrate in real-time like Joe and Teresa Giudice's did in Napa Valley, everything else is just kind of lame.
Unless Tinkerbell comes ... fairy dust and fatties for everyone!
What did you think of the episode? Think Vicki and Brooks will last?
Photo via bravotv.com