kristen stewartYou guys, Kristen Stewart's birthday is right around the corner! It's Tuesday, April 9 -- mark your calendars. So how will KStew pass the big day? A friend says, "Kristin is looking forward to celebrating her birthday with Rob and a few of her close friends. She's not really into making a big deal about her own birthday." I can see it all now, Kristen kicking back in her flannel shirt and Converse sneakers, having a few beers with her pals while they watch everything in the new Twilight DVD box set. It's going to be real.

I'm dying to find out what Rob's getting her.

Rob must have a special gift in mind for his ex-ex-girlfriend. Something that says, "I loved you, and then you broke my heart, and then I took you back and then I went to Australia for two months, and it looks like we're back together again now but I dunno." Kristen's friend says, "she doesn’t want anything because she feels like she already has everything. Spending time with Rob is the best birthday present for her." DAWWW!

(BARF)

Okay, that's kind of gross. It reminds me of every birthday my mother ever had, when she said the exact same thing and yet seemed vaguely disappointed every damn time. Don't fall for it, Rob! Don't fall for the "I have everything I could want I just want to spend time with you" trap. Spending time together is ALWAYS an inadequate birthday gift. You could do that on Monday. You need to make the birthday special.

Rumor has it Rob may get Kristen another rescue dog to join their other two dogs, Bear and Bernie. If so, please expect a dog naming contest here at The Stir. First one to guess correctly wins your very own Robert Pattinson doll.

What do you think Rob will give Kristen for her birthday?