There are now officially two types of people in America. The ones who thought Oscars host Seth MacFarlane singing about seeing the boobs of America's most talented actresses on film was hilarious. And the ones who felt really bad that they'd just been snarking on Anne Hathaway's nipples on the red carpet because they were totally offended by We Saw Your Boobs.
Ah yes, American hypocrisy at its best. One minute "Anne Hathaway Les Nipperables" was trending on Twitter as the world homed in on the pointy bits of the Les Miserables actress' Prada dress. The next the Twitterverse was exploding with complaints that the Family Guy creator's opening number was offensive to women.
Women said they were "furious." "Disappointed."
They called it sexist. They complained that We Saw Your Boobs is a smack at the hard work female actresses have put into honing their craft, and they moaned that MacFarlane just managed to piss off fully half of the folks nominated for Oscars.
Were you one of those people?
You might want to know that neither Charlize Theron nor Naomi Watts, who were seen looking angry in the audience, were actually pissed. In fact, if you looked closely, those shots weren't even live. If they had been, Theron would be teaching classes at Hogwarts School of Wizardry because she managed to get onstage to dance with Channing Tatum awfully darn fast from her seat in the audience (not to mention changing her dress!).
So if the actresses weren't bothered by mention of their onscreen nudity, should American women be offended?
It was certainly low brow humor that brought out our inner 12-year-old boy. It would likely never happen to male actors. And it put some of America's finest actresses on par with the Kim Kardashians of the world, baring their breasts for, well, nothing.
But here's the thing, America.
It was a skit that poked fun not at the actresses but at host MacFarlane himself, at his brand of humor, at America's taste for the likes of Family Guy and for ogling Anne Hathaway's nipples.
We Saw Your Boobs wasn't debasing actresses. If anything, it was doing the opposite. It was putting the boob oglers, the nipple gazers, the wardrobe malfunction enthusiasts, the sex tape hunters on notice: you can't have it both ways.
And, OK, it was making us laugh ... like 12-year-olds.
Check out We Saw Your Boobs one more time ... are you offended?
Image via Getty Images/Kevin Winter