The Grammy awards were supposed to be a boob-free fest according to a memo the show circulated to the stars, asking them to please dress respectfully. You didn't think everyone was gonna follow that, didja?! Katy Perry and her 1,000-watt cleavage stuffed inside a mint green Gucci dress certainly didn't. Hey, if I had those knockers, I'd want to show them to the world, too. Take that, Russell! But the funniest moment of the evening came when Ellen DeGeneres came face to boob with Katy's natural (?) wonders. The photo sparked all kinds of commentary about what Ellen might have been thinking when she got mammary overload.
"Here I am taking a tasteful glance at @KatyPerry's dress," Ellen wrote on Twitter. That was retweeted almost 6,000 times. You got to hand it to Ellen's wife, Portia de Rossi, who seemed to take the whole thing in stride, laughing as Ellen's eyes gobbled up another woman's bazooms.
Some things Ellen could have been saying:
"Oh my gawd, is that jeweled necklace real, Katy?!"
"Portia, what are those things?"
"Look, I think Katy's boobs ate the no boob memo!"
"Heeelllooooo down there! Echo, echo, echoooooooo!!!"
"Katy, I'd love to have your boobs on my show. Have them call me."
"Oh, hi, John. Yeah, can't blame ya."
"See, Portia? THIS is the reason I love women."
Well, okay, now you know why I never win those New Yorker caption contests. What have you got?
Image via Getty