'Bachelorette' Emily Maynard & Jef Holm

Jef Holm and Emily Maynard had just about as public of a breakup as humanly possibly. Which is, you know, expected when you meet, fall in "love," and get engaged on national television. Rumors are swirling that The Bachelorette star is dating 23-year-old Katianna Bear from New Orleans, but last night on Twitter, Jef put 'em to rest saying that he is single and will be single for a long time.

Wow. You know, I've never really been sure why people think going on TV to "find love" is a good, successful idea, but it seems like Jef may not be totally loopy. The man's got a point: Waiting to get into anything serious is definitely smart. It's also what he needs. Follow me on this one:

Jef gave his whole heart to Emily. The duo got engaged, which means he really thought at one point that he could see himself spending the rest of his life with her (or that's what TV magic wants us to think). Regardless, there were a lot of intense feelings involved and that's not just something you can brush off and forget the second a good looking newbie comes around.

After a big breakup, you've got to be fair to yourself and your new partner. Yeah, a new love interest may make you feel happy and excited, but it's important to really think if you've moved on from your previous gig. Do you still have feelings for your ex? Are there things that you need to figure out on your own? Yeah, you may believe that you're over it, but the truth of the matter is that these things take time.

Hey, I'm no Dr. Phil, but I am someone who has experience my own fair share of heartache before. Taking time for yourself and defining what it is you want out of your next relationship are important things to do before you can really move on. Kudos to Jef for realizing he needs time, whether or not he's dating Ms. Bear.

Do you need time after a breakup before jumping into something new?

 

Image via ABC