One of the best quotes to come out of The Real Housewives of Atlanta was during the reunion, a few years back, when NeNe Leakes told Kim Zolciak to "close your legs to married men." NeNe was, of course, talking about Kim's relationship with a very mysterious sugar daddy she called Big Poppa, who was reportedly married yet supporting, and sleeping with, Kim on the side. Big Poppa was an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in silk linens and a Bentley, but now, m'fellow RHOA fans, HE'S REVEALED HIMSELF.
Well, OK. He's not so much revealed himself as he's been arrested and now his mugshot is public domain, but STILL. There he is! There's big ole Big Poppa.
Kim and Lee split up after season two and, if you can recall, Kim then started dating a woman who was a DJ. Yeah. Remember Kim's lesbian phase? It seems like so long ago, especially now that she's got two young boys, is married to an NFLer, and seems to be living a relatively normal life.
Ah, I kind of miss the good old days when Kim sipped Chardonnay in her car and crooned on the phone to Big Poppa about how she needed x, y, and z to make her happy.
Now, the only crazy thing she does is tell racist jokes. Womp womp.
In case you were wondering, Lee was arrested for failing to appear in court after he didn't fix a storm water system in one of his homes. He's already been charged $75,000 for his neglect -- I guess arresting him was the only option authorities were left.
Big Poppa be tardy for the paying for your storm water system party. I think Kim just found herself a new verse for her song.
Are you surprised to see Big Poppa?
Photo via Fulton County Court