ian somerhalder nina dobrev vampire diariesIan Somerhalder may be one of the top contenders to play Christian Grey in the Fifty Shades of Grey movie as far as his fans are concerned. But his #1 fan, girlfriend and Vampire Diaries co-star Nina Dobrev seems to think he's got little in common with the fictional, brooding billionaire. And that's a good thing.

In the November issue of Self, she discusses the relationship "pre-req" Ian has: "He has to be a happy person. You’ll laugh and enjoy life more." Interesting ... As hot as he may be to plenty of women all over the world, Christian Grey definitely doesn't come off as a "happy person!" But hey, clearly, that wasn't a dealbreaker for Anastasia Steele ...

Regardless, I appreciate what Nina's saying. There's no doubt that being with a man who is positive, funny, and handles stress well can make a relationship easier and help you de-stress, "laugh, and enjoy life more," as she says. No one wants to be with a Donnie Downer! And when women are reading books like Fifty Shades and thinking of someone completely screwed-up and likely depressed like Christian Grey as the Ultimate Lover, what Nina said needs to be said.

But, at the same time, I don't necessarily think its fair to expect your partner to be the one who helps you enjoy life. Or to even necessarily expect him to be "happy" more often than not. If we do that, we're just setting ourselves up for disappointment. People ask me all the time how I'm so smiley, upbeat, positive, and pffft! Although I am a generally cheerful, optimistic person, I am NOT happy 24/7/365. Who is?

What's more, it's a mistake for anyone to rely on their partner to make and keep them happy. We have to be able to do that for ourselves.

Ultimately, though, I'm sure Nina's just saying she appreciates Ian's generally upbeat nature. That's awesome, and of course, no real cause for concern when it comes to the Fifty Shades flick. As long as he's a competent actor, Ian's genuinely sunny personality certainly won't be a dealbreaker when it comes to portraying Christian Grey.

Do you have the same relationship pre-req as Nina?

 

Image via TheCW.com