It was more of the Teresa Giudice crazy show tonight on part two of The Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion. For an extra added dose of insanity, Joe Giudice came out and joined the ladies on the couches, and it was one big delusional drama fest.
There was so much yelling and so much crap being thrown about, it's hard to even know where to start. So let's try to break it down into the most unbelievable moments -- and by unbelievable I mean both those that made us question if they could even possibly be happening and those in which the person talking was just clearly full of crap.
Big surprise -- they're all brought to us by the Giudices. God bless.
1. Teresa claiming Melissa Gorga's song "On Display" was written about her.
Did she really say that out loud? Why yes, she did. Like I said, unbelievable.
2. Teresa couldn't come up with a single example of Caroline Manzo bullying her.
"All season" and "a lot of things" were the best she could do. Really? Andy Cohen gives her the floor to take Caroline to task for all of her wrongs, and she can't think of a single one? Huh ... Napalm flashback.
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3. Teresa acting like a crazy person.
I know she was trying to make a point, but falling to her knees in her gaudy green gown and waving her hands about yelling, "Thank you, God! Thank you, God!" about Jacqueline and Caroline being out of her life made her look ready for a straitjacket. Straight up.
4. Teresa singing "On Display".
Please, not ever again. The fact that she demanded Melissa sing the whole song after she sang a few lines (and sang them very well) to prove she doesn't lip sync just showed how relentless Teresa is. Her singing Melissa's song just proved that she must not be able to hear herself.
5. Joe Giudice's explanation as to who he was talking to on the phone while they were in Napa.
Juicy Joe said (while looking at the floor and making no eye contact) that he was taking care of business with his friend Albie. When Andy questioned why he needed to switch to another language, he said it was because the Spanish pizza guy needed help. Uh huh. He was less believable than my toddler who tells me she didn't eat the candy as chocolate drips from her mouth. And a hell of a lot less cute too.
6. Joe Giudice. Period.
From his ridiculous getup to his glassy beady eyes and completely belligerent attitude about being there, the guy was more repellent than ever. The big belch he let out toward the end just perfectly punctuated his patheticness, and his smug mug throughout the whole encounter made Jacqueline's assertions that Joe has cheated with everyone from his secretary to their babysitter seem all the more believable.
Perhaps what's most unbelievable though is that there's yet more drama to discuss. Part three is up next week ... if you can handle anymore?
Did you believe Joe Giudice's explanation? What did you find most unbelievable on tonight's reunion?
Image via Bravo