Kristen Stewart Wants a Wedding, Robert Pattinson Wants a Drink

kristen stewart robert pattinsonRight now, Robert Pattinson is into "booze and Buddhism". And who can blame him? Aren't we all after getting royally effed over by the person we thought was our one true love? And conversely, as we speak, Kristen Stewart is deciding whether or not she should put Nikki Reed and Charlize Theron at the same table at her and Rob's upcoming wedding, because she wants to lock that shit dowwwnnn. And who can blame her? When you get the person you love back after cheating on them, you overcompensate.

This is probably all very confusing and annoying to you right now, as I'm speaking in cryptic, teasing sentences. So let's have a nice, civilized chat, where we break it down, after the jump.

Last one there's a rotten egg!

Kennedy, a Los Angeles radio host, or as I know her, a '90s MTV veejay, was at an exclusive Black Keys concert recently, where, obviously, Rob was, also. The two apparently struck up a conversation where a solid hour was spent discussing the benefits of "Buddhism and booze" when you're trying to mend a broken heart. Kennedy posted a photo of herself and Rob to her Facebook page with the caption: "Next thing you’re going to tell me Robert Pattinson was [at the concert], and we spent an hour talking about booze and Buddhism. Oh, wait ..."

Meanwhile, across town ...

Hollywood Life is claiming that, as of now, Kristen so thrilled to have Rob back that she "would absolutely want to get engaged soon, maybe even elope this winter."

Sounds like these two lovehate birds are in completely different places emotionally right now. On one hand we have Rob, zen and cautious, trying to wrap his head around the fact that, holy shit, he took Kristen back! And on the other, we have Kristen, desperate and excited, trying to wrap her head around the fact that, holy shit, Rob took her back!

This is a good thing.

Even if Kristen and Rob are meant to eventually die in each other's arms, fingers entwined, hearts beating as one, they should not get married right now. They're fresh off of a serious "relationship issue" that is no way yet healed.

So, Rob, take Kristen back if you love her and want to work it out. But, please, keep your third eye on the booze and Buddhism right now. You don't want to do anything stupid.

What do you think of this?


Image via accidentalpaparazzi/Flickr

kristen stewart, robert pattinson, twilight

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Shelby Lynn Pettus

I THINK EVERYBODY ORTH TO STAY OUT OF THEIR LOVE LIFE AND LET THEM DO WHAT THEY THINK  S BEST,,  LOVE U BOTH  ROB  & KRISTEN

Jennifer Curry

Amen only they can make the decision if they are happy with each other leave them alone. Love u Rob & Kristen

Amy Mroczkowski

I think you should let them make there own choices!!! They are adults! I believe in they are meant to be I love them both!

nonmember avatar Anna

Rob needs to let his heart mend and regain his trust before making a big life changing move. I would hope they get back together like everyone else but not my choice. Love Rob & Kris.

Mari Tan

Keep stirring the pot until you have nothing to say.  Leave them in PEACE !

Joyce Whitt

This is drivel . This story is full of BS. Man you just can't get anything from them so you make crap up. I don't believe a word. No one else should believe it either.

nonmember avatar me

She wants a wedding, he wants a drink........I just want them both to fall off the face of the earth already!

rccol... rccola1945

  HA! HA!HA! This one just makes me laugh. Anyone that believes any of this, grap, I have a lake, in the middle of the desert, I'd just love to sell. Now, LEAVE THEM ALONE, YOU STUPID PIG'S. Did you really think, any of us are that stupid? I may have been born at night, but it sure as hell, wasn't last night. Creeps. We all love you, Rob & Kristen.

nonmember avatar Guest43

She may have to lick his butt crack to get him back.

rccol... rccola1945

  Have you ever tried that one? Get real please,& I can think of other thing to lick, like a pop-cicle.

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