It was a sad, sad day for everyone when we heard the news that Jersey Shore was entering its final season. I know I'll get a little misty-eyed every time I go to the gym, then go tanning, and then do my laundry ... in that order.
But if MTV says it's time to move on, then it's time to move on. And that's exactly what Ronnie Ortiz-Magro is planning on doing. He's actually leaving The Shore with a much more positive outlook than I'd expect. "I’m walking away with the girl of my dreams and some amazing memories. I’ll definitely be nostalgic but I’m ready to move forward," he said.
Um, Ronnie? Is that you? And are you talking about your rollercoaster ride of a relationship with Sammi Sweetheart?
I'll be the first one to admit that I'm not a big fan of Ronnie. The size of his ego is about the size of his biceps and it's just never been attractive to me. But more importantly, he made me cringe as I watched season after season while he emotionally abused my girl Sammi.
Which is why I'm not buying the whole "girl of my dreams" garbage. They've spent years breaking up, getting back together, crying, cheating, screaming, smooshing, destroying furniture ... but now they're suddenly this totally smitten couple? Once the cameras stop rolling? Really? Sorry, Ron but I have to call your bluff.
If I know MTV like I think I do, then they'll be playing Jersey Shore marathons like crazy. And those reruns can't help SamRon's relationship. One minute they're planning on moving in together, and the next -- an episode comes on and Ronnie's motorboating a cocktail waitress and kissing two grenades at once. How can Ron and Sam possibly move forward in a relationship where you can purchase a DVD box set of your significant other betraying you like that?
And Sammi ... I'm sure it's nice to hear that you're the girl of someone's dreams. And I'm sure it's easy to get caught up in the moment. But the man still smashed your furniture to pieces and threw your bed out the window. Nothing dreamy about that.
Are you believing that Ronnie is really that smitten by Sammi after all this time?
Image via MTV