robert pattinson in cosmopolisT minus one week now until Robert Pattinson makes his tremendously anticipated post-scandal appearance on Good Morning America. Oh, sure, he's planning to sit down and chat with Jon Stewart on The Daily Show first, but GMA interviews are much more fitting territory for a celeb to bare their soul (or make a scene a la Chris Brown).

And while the interview was initially booked to promote Cosmopolis, sources close to ABC tell the New York Post that the interview has NO restrictions! "Everything's on the table" for the discussion. Whooooa! If that's true, there's no way around it: GMA is totally going to milk Rob for full emotional disclosure. How on earth is this going to go down?! We have a few ideas! Here, eight possible ways RPattz might address the scandal ...

  1. He'll walk into the interview falling down drunk and answer the interviewer's questions in mostly incomprehensible slurs, but we'll be able to make out the occasional "bloody," "rubbish," "cheating," and "KStew."
  2. In an attempt to show Kristen just how much she's screwed him over (while plugging his new flick of course), he'll pull out a gun and shoot through his hand -- a la Cosmopolis.
  3. He'll appear with his arm thrown around ex-girlfriend and possible reignited flame Nina Schubert to make us think KStew is sooo last week.
  4. He'll open his shirt and distract us by sparkling up a storm (a la Edward Cullen).  
  5. He'll say something along the lines of, "I'm deeply sorry for the hurt and embarrassment my ex-girlfriend caused to those close to us and everyone this has affected. This momentary indiscretion of my ex-girlfriend's has jeopardized the most important thing in her life, the person she loved and respected the most ... Yeah rrrrright!!!!"
  6. He'll make an awkward, self-deprecating joke and laugh it off.
  7. He'll embarrass the interviewer for even going there. "Come on, man ... I'm not here for that. You're better than that. So back to what David Cronenberg said ..."
  8. Most likely, he'll say he would prefer not to address that question and politely steer back to Cosmopolis.

How do you think Rob will handle questions about Kristen's affair?

 

Image via cosmopolisthefilm.com