No matter what you think of Robsten Cheatgate -- whether it's the worst thing anyone has ever done, or it's merely a silly celebrity thing that has nothing to do with any of us -- one thing is certain. The Kristen Stewart le scandale has been a goldmine. For the tabloids!! Imagine being a tabloid. That whole Katie Holmes-Tom Cruise divorce was like manna from heaven. For about two weeks. But now Kristen Stewart is cheating on Rob Pattinson with her married 41-year-old Snow White director?! Ca-ching!
But even this story will have a shelf life. So it must be kept going with ever more fantastical -- even opposing -- theories. Rob is devastated! No, Rob is thankful! Kristen and her director only kissed! No, they've been having an affair for months! And now we've reached the capper. The absolute highest gossip pinnacle. That is ... KStew's "pregnancy nightmare"! And, uh, who's the daddy? Da-dun-duuuuun!!! (Picture KStew's frozen soap opera face here.)
Yes, folks, Star magazine is reporting on its August 13 cover that Kristen Stewart has a "pregnancy nightmare" and it asks the burning question, "Who'll be the father?" Indeed, who, who? John Edwards? No, silly, presumably the question means either Robert Pattinson or Rupert Sanders. The headline begs some other questions, such as:
- If Rupert is the daddy, did KStew conceive in her car under the Hollywood sign?
- Was she wearing RPattz's hat during conception?
- NOW who gets the dog? Will the baby and the dog get along?
- Does her "pregnancy nightmare" even refer to her own pregnancy -- or maybe that of her dog's?
If any of this is true, and presuming the relationship between Kristen and Rob isn't a showmance, then I don't mean to make light of this situation. Because somewhere, behind all of the lurid stories, there are two actual people, perhaps four, going through a lot of emotional turmoil. It's just hard to know what's real and what's fiction. Such is the life of a celebrity.
Do you think KStew's "pregnancy nightmare" is real or are the tabs just dreaming?
Image via Star Magazine
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Comments 36
is it me or does anybody else notice that this article says that this was reported on AUGUST 13TH!!! IT'S ONLY AUGUST 2ND, PEOPLE!
What if its not any of there baby! And its someone else? OH SHIT!!! ITS ABOUT TO GO DOWN!!!
They make magazines before the actual date! don't you know that?
ummm yah i think they say every chick is pregnant and every couple is getting married however i just hope them the best in life and they are people not just stars so i for one will keep them in my prayers
Whoever thought this garbage up at this rag of a magazine ought to have their mind washed out along with their mouth. Jeez. How can they publish such crap?
The tabs are just sucking this situation to death. Give all of these people a break. Don't you know, this is a heartbreaking situation. For the,love of God, just go away,& let these 4 people, have a little peace,so they can try to move on.
What is the Enquirer saying??? hahaha
That is crazy. It is just Star Mag making up stories like the ones the have been making up since the first twilight movie. I hope it is not true and Rob is able to move on and find himself someone who is ten times better then Kristen!!!!!!!!!!