The big news in celebrity-land these days is that Katie Holmes filed for divorce from Tom Cruise, and while most of us are rooting for Katie because we suspect Tom is a giant freakshow, we'll never know the real reason their marriage broke up. I mean, maybe he left the toilet seat up one too many times. Maybe she was sick of towering over him in heels. Maybe he likes to perform that Risky Business underwear dance on a nightly basis and she just couldn't take it any more.
One thing's certain, though: we're going to hear lots and lots and LOTS of rumored explanations for what caused their split. The latest, courtesy of TMZ, is that Katie was desperate to protect Suri from a specific Scientology ritual -- a form of interrogation practiced by the church that's so creepy, she didn't want her kid to have anything to do with it.
Apparently Holmes is worried that Suri will have to endure the Scientology ritual known as sec checking. Sec checking -- security checking -- reportedly involves an "ethics officer" asking an individual member a large number of questions while they hold the electrode handles on a device called an e-meter. The personal questions are supposedly intended to help the church locate "areas of spiritual distress."
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As the story goes, in 2005 Holmes saw Cruise's older children, Isabella Jane Cruise and Connor Cruise, being subjected to a sec check, and she's now freaked that Suri will have to go through the same thing.
Now, I have no idea if this rumor is true, but it sounds plausible. There's a specific Scientology sec check for children aged 6-12, and Suri did just turn 6 in April, so maybe she was being prepped for the practice and Holmes was like, 1-800-LAW-YRUP. Yeah, she probably should have thought this whole Scientology wife thing through a little better, but I'm guessing that the longer she was exposed to it, the weirder it all got.
As for the specifics of the sec check practice, the "Whole Track" sec check is reportedly hundreds of questions long, and includes jaw-droppers like these:
- Did you come to Earth for evil purposes?
- Have you ever smothered a baby?
- Have you ever enslaved a population?
- Have you ever destroyed a culture?
- Have you ever torn out someone's tongue?
- Have you ever made a planet, or nation, radioactive?
Wow. Just ... wow.
But don't worry, the kid's version is just 99 questions! For example:
- What has somebody told you not to tell?
- Have you ever decided you did not like some member of your family?
- Have you ever done something you were very much ashamed of?
- Have you ever taken something belonging to somebody else and never given it back?
- Have you ever refused to obey an order from someone you should obey?
- Have you ever gotten yourself dirty on purpose?
Boy, I don't know what Katie Holmes was so worried about! This all sounds perfectly normal and healthy and OH MY GOD RUN KATIE RUN LIKE THE WIND.
What's your take on this latest rumor about Katie and Tom? Do you think there's any truth to the idea that Katie initiated the divorce because she was worried about Scientology practices?
Image via Jay Tamboli/Flickr