We know what most of you think of 50 Shades of Grey. And we know what the the "Three Golden Sisters" grandmas think of Kim Kardashian's sex video. But what do the Three Golden Sisters think of 50 Shades of Grey? I think it's about time we find out, don't you? Let's call it Three Shades of Grey on 50 Shades of Grey.
I think we all know what's coming: Wacky old-lady shock and awe at the sexual high-jinx in this best-selling mommy porn. Their take-away? "Never do anything that hurts!" I am totally with you on that one, grannies! But wait until they get to the terms of Anastasia and Christian's contract.
"'At the touch of leather I quiver and gasp'..." It takes her a moment to put that together: "He whipped her!" "Oh my God, he sounds like a good lovah."
"It went off!" I thought that was part of the novel but nope, the iPad (or is it a Kindle) suddenly flickered off. Too much excitement for the iPad? What happens when these ladies get their hands on a cordless, rechargable vibrator? Never mind, I don't want to know.
What's a little whipping? That doesn't bother these ladies. But guess what does: "The contract bothered me. Did you read the stupid contract?" It's true, nothing ruins the mood like a stupid contract. Unless you're trying to avoid fire and electrocution in the bedroom.
"No acts involving urination -- ugh!" Who knew that was a thing?
"...vaginal fisting. What's vaginal fisting?" One of the sisters demonstrates and -- "OH! That hurts. She's crazy!" Who knew THAT was a thing?!?
"What the hell is a butt plug?" Horrified silence. No one knows.
"I'm puzzled." This look says it all:
What would your grandma make of 50 Shades of Grey?
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