Tonight's double episodes of 16 & Pregnant featured Sabrina and Sarah. Sarah is young, but, like about 90 percent of the moms on this show, she neither has a dad herself nor has a stellar baby daddy. Lucky teen mom Sabrina has a little bit more of a hopeful situation.
Unlike Sabrina whose baby daddy gave her a lot of grief throughout the episode, but eventually came through, Sarah's baby daddy is as bad as they come. Even though she has been with Blake for five years, he can't be bothered to give money for the baby or any energy for his new baby girl.
"I wanted her to have what I didn't," Sarah cried. Sadly, she is hardly alone among teen moms. The sad truth of teen motherhood is that it's often a path girls end up walking by themselves.
Even Sabrina who has a much better boyfriend than Sarah came from a broken home where her only dream for her child is an intact family. It seems intact families really are in short supply, especially among people who have children so young.
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In Sabrina's case it was the mom who left, but Sarah's story is much, much more typical. MTV had a piece this week about how many baby daddies actually stay around and the truth is depressing.
Most teen moms don't end up living with the father of their child.
This may seem obvious, but the fact is, pregnancy is different for boys than it is for girls. When Sarah cried about how they both made her daughter, but only she cared for her and how it was both of their responsibilities, it made me feel for her. But it's also a bit of wishful thinking. He was never a good choice as her baby's father.
Besides, why did she choose to have a baby if she was going to hate it so much? Women do have choices even after conception. Men don't. And if they DO make a "choice" they are seen as deadbeats and jerks who need to "step up." In theory, that is nice. But in practice, is a 17-year-old high school drop-out REALLY the best choice for the father of your baby?
As much as I feel for these girls, it's also important that they understand how they made the choices that led to this. Taking responsibility for our choices is half the battle -- whatever that means.
Sarah and Sabrina didn't need to have babies. They made the choices to do so with or without the consent of the fathers.
Unfortunately, that is just the reality of this reality show.
Do you think these dads who leave are awful people?
Image via MTV