Hey, girl. Be careful that your beautiful body isn't crushed by that speeding taxi, so I can continue to worship every last one of your curves. OMG, you guys, Laurie Penny is the luckiest girl on earth—not only was she saved from getting flattened by a taxi at a busy New York intersection yesterday, she was saved by RYAN GOSLING.
It's SO weird because I totally had a dream once that Ryan Gosling saved me from getting hit by a car. Only in my dream he was naked. And the car was made out of chocolate. Also, Alexander Skarsgård was waiting in the wings just in case Gosling, you know, needed a break or anything.
You may have seen British writer Laurie Penny's post on Twitter yesterday, because it seems like it was retweeted about a jillion times. I mean, of COURSE it was, because how awesome is this?
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As her story goes, Gosling stopped her from walking into opposing traffic on Tuesday evening, which she had started to do because she briefly forgot that New Yorkers drive on the right side of the road. Penny went on to say,
I was crossing 6th avenue in a new pink wig. Not looking the right way because I am from London. Ryan Gosling grabbed me away from a taxi. He did not say ‘hey, girl.’ He said ‘hey, watch out!’ Identity of no-idea-if-actually-a-manarchist-but-definitely-a-decent-sort Ryan Gosling confirmed by girl near me, who said ‘you lucky bitch.’
Lucky bitch indeed. I'd be dining out on that story for, like, the rest of my life. ("Hey, did I ever tell you about the time that—" "YES. SHUT UP ABOUT RYAN GOSLING AND THE TAXI, OH MY GOD.")
The crazy thing is this isn't even the first time Gosling has been Manhattan's hottest and most sensitive superhero. Last August he was captured on video breaking up a street fight between a street vendor and customer, and if by chance you haven't seen the clip, it's well worth BICEPS taking a DELTOIDS look:
Boy, it's almost as if Gosling is on some sort of mission to make People magazine really regret that whole Bradley Cooper thing, because excuse me, when's the last time Cooper saved a woman's life or broke up a fistfight? Bradley may be able to grow a disturbingly porny moustache, but I'm pretty sure Ryan Gosling is definitively the Sexiest Man Alive. Or at the very least, the Sexiest Crossing Guard Alive.
Does this story only deepen your love for the undeniable magic that is Ryan Gosling?
Image via Flickr/gdcgraphics