After the big drama on the last episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills in which Taylor and Russell Armstrong were denied access to Kyle Richards’ big White Party, everyone needed a break. So off they all went to Hawaii to celebrate Mauricio’s birthday ... minus the Armstrongs, of course.
Oh, and Kim Richards, who -- big surprise -- was MIA. She didn't have a driver’s license, couldn’t find her passport or her keys, and got lost somewhere in Honolulu. Whatever. Given the fact that she’s now in rehab, she gets some sort of pass, but her behavior was just bizarre. “We take over,” she said/screeched of her and Ken’s presence on the dance floor where she whipped her ponytail in circles and slobbered all over him and his teeth-picking self. Yeah, something like taking over.
Anyway, that drama aside, the rest of the bunch was having a perfectly lovely time en route to and in Lanai. Brandi Glanville + Xanax + alcohol = awesome entertainment, especially because of Lisa Vanderpump’s reactions to her. From declaring every man who drives a red Ferrari to be a douche bag with a small penis to telling Lisa she didn’t see the love between and her husband Ken, Lisa was bloody taken aback by Brandi, but also quite amused by her too, I think.
When Brandi fawned all over Ken, Lisa protested good-naturedly and let Brandi know her right nipple was about to pop out. “Bloody hell, I’m going to have to put out tonight,” she said. Of Brandi’s miniscule bikini, Lisa offered, “I’m not going to beat around the bush, it was see-thru. Actually, there was no bush.” Ha, that’s the Lisa we love, and Brandi is a hell of a lot of fun. I'm glad the ladies didn't scare her off in the beginning.
Then just as everyone was getting misted with Evian water and basking in the sun and splash of the dolphins, Taylor called. “You know what, my marriage is over.” She proceeded to tell Kyle and Lisa that Russell was moving out and that she was at peace ... she just wished they were all back home. That was a little bit of a vacation downer to hear while on a beautiful beach, but also a relief it seemed.
In the opening scenes when they were riding back from the White Party, it was clear how Russell had no intention of taking responsibility for his actions. Taylor stuck to her script that Camille’s words were “an exaggeration,” while Russell kept driving his point that they were “a lie.” It was such a sad look at what was seemingly a very manipulative and dysfunctional relationship. Fortunately, Taylor found some strength to get out of it, but unfortunately Russell never found the strength to deal with the demons that seemed to destroy their relationship.
Based on previews for next week, Kim does somehow catch up with the rest of the group in Hawaii with Ken (who Brandi pretty accurately described as looking like a gay Bull Mastiff in the face) in tow. Things don’t look pretty in paradise. Poor Mauricio (or "Maurice" as Kim calls him for some odd reason), what a bummer of a birthday.
What did you think of Brandi’s behavior? Were you surprised this was when Taylor broke off her marriage to Russell?
Image via Bravo