Fantastic news, Lindsay Lohan fans! (All … two of you!) According to wealthy businessman Hugh Hefner, who I'm sure is remarkably lucid and capable of tying his own robe and summoning a wrinkly boner with a little pharmaceutical assistance, the December/January issue of Playboy is not only breaking sales records—it's going to go down in history as the moment when Lindsay turned her entire life around.
While it may seem that Lindsay is up to her old tricks (lounging around partying in Hawaii with $10,000 in her purse, just in case an opportunity to purchase a massive rock of cocaine some souvenirs came up), according to Hef we're missing the big picture. The picture of her naked hooters, that is, which signifies her big career comeback.
Yep, she should be rocketing back to the top of her game any minute now. After all, if an 85-year-old lad-mag publisher said it, it must be true.
Hefner compared Lindsay's photo spread to Drew Barrymore's 1995 Playboy appearance, saying that Barrymore had also been in a "transitional" point in her career when she stripped for the magazine:
Historically, Playboy pictorials are connected to celebrities at various times in their career. Sometimes it's the beginning of their career and sometimes it comes at a particular moment — as with Lindsay — that is intended as a turnaround.
Okay, but uhhh ... Barrymore had already left her trainwrecky days behind her at that point, so, you know, there's ONE difference.
Hefner insists that despite all the endless legal dramas and rehab stints, Team Lindsay is still alive and well—and that this is her moment to finally get her life back on track:
(…) this is a born-again beginning for Lindsay. I think there's a rooting interest for her.
I'm not sure about the born-again beginning, but I have to agree with his second statement. I'm not particularly invested in Lindsay's future career, but like her or not, you'd have to be a heartless a-hole not to hope she manages to pull out of the tailspin she's been in lately.
It seems bizarre and more than a little unlikely that a Playboy spread could be the one thing that finally convinces her to get it together and pursue the fame she appeared destined for back in her freckles-and-pigtails days, but if it works, more power to her. And to Hef, of course, for somehow knowing that the second naked Marilyn pictorial would be the charm.
Are you still rooting for Lindsay? Do you think her Playboy shoot is the start of a comeback?
Image via Playboy
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Comments (7)
It's not that I don't hope she pulls out of this tailspin, so much as I gave up caring about it several DUIs ago. The nude pictorial is about four years and two pounds of cocaine too late.
She looks less like herself than ever in the issue, which is probably why it's so popular.
I don't think she will ever ever be the actress she was before. Such a shame.
I'm far from a fan of Lindsay, but you are a crazy hater. So what if her Playboy spread is doing well. There's no need to go after a troubled young girl who is the product of what sounds like a pretty dysfunctional home and Hugh Hefner. What have they ever done to you?
Comeback? Uh... no. I think she's too far gone. The girl needs to put her boobs away, take what's left of her money and go live a "nornal" life. It's pretty apparent that fame is quite literally killing this girl and everyone around her is too busy making a buck to care.