David Beckham died in a single vehicle crash on Route 80 between Morristown and Roswell. He was pronounced dead at the scene by paramedics responding to the vehicle accident and was identified by photo ID found on his body. Alcohol and drugs do not appear to have been a factor in this accident.
So says a random website, which is apparently full of lying lies that lie, anyway. Despite the worried rumors that swept Twitter yesterday, it appears David Beckham is perfectly fine, in good health, and presumably as stupendously handsome as ever.
Beckham has been falsely pronounced dead several times over the last few years, and he's hardly alone. Check out these other celebrities who have suffered tragic, heartbreaking, and utterly untrue deaths before their time:
Taylor Lautner. Websites had Taylor going out in style: apparently he went to a party where he hooked up with some exotic dancers, and reportedly bragged at one point that he had “railed two eight balls worth of yeyo” out of one of the stripper's buttocks. He then experienced convulsions and died shortly thereafter from a cocaine overdose. Of course, none of this actually happened, not that you can tell from this seemingly-earnest Facebook memorial page.
Justin Bieber. Oh my god, they killed Kenny Justin Bieber! Or more accurately, he killed himself! Or even more accurately than that, Bieber is totally fine and probably working on yet another women's fragrance! OH MY GOD!
Eddie Murphy, Owen Wilson, Christian Slater, Adam Sandler, Jim Carrey, Avril Lavigne, and Jaden Smith. In an unbelievably horrific coincidence, all of these celebrities reportedly died in a snowboarding accident. Worse, they all separately collided with a tree in Zermatt, Switzerland—dear lord, won't somebody, ANYBODY, cut down that awful deadly tree?
Tony Danza, Hilary Duff, Tom Cruise, and Jeff Goldblum. While someone's taking a look at that incredibly dangerous Swiss tree, they should also review the fencing around the Kauri Cliffs in New Zealand, because I guess that railing's a bitch.
Rick Astley. Okay, this one's actually not funny at all. Apparently Astley really did die of heart failure, and here's the full coverage from CNN to prove it:
Have you seen any of these celebrity death hoaxes?
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